My life in a nutshell.

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Punching animals

I know everybody dreams about punching random animals in the face for the sake of doing it, it's our god given right to do so as human beings. So I made a quick list of some critters that deserve my fist in their faces.


A bee, as hard as I could. Sure bees do us a favor with pollination and all, but I'm sick and tired of them flying all around with those fucking stingers all "haha i own this place and if you piss me off i'm gonna sting you good, motherfucker!" yeah fuck you bee.

A gorilla.
And no I wouldn't stay around after punching it.

A Panda Bear, because all they give a fuck about is eating, they won't even fuck to save their own species.

I want to punch a Walrus in the stomach to see if the noise it makes resembles a friend's snore.


A mormon.

Tom Cruise's baby. I hate that thing. I want to punch it so hard. It's not human, it had a full head of dark ass hair straight out the womb.

I would love to punch a giant squid right in its eye, underwater in its own turf then I'd turn around and punch the sperm whale I hitched a ride on on to get to the squid. Blaow! Right in the blow hole!

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koala, I cant think of a justifiable reason of why or a witty statement, but its the first thing I pictured punching in the face. It just seems like a perfect match, fist to koala face.

I'd also like to punch a Tasmanian devil in the face... the little fucks think they are so tough.... i'll punch it right in it's devil eye and knock it the fuck out.


I would want to punch and Emperor Penguin in the face.
I mean, it's tall enough that you don't have to really mess with your punching motion, and I'm sure being called an Emperor for so long has gone to it's head. Then I would step on its egg.

I'd punch a stingray in the face. Score one back for the ol' croc hunter. Keeeeyahhh!

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A platypus, because you'd be hitting 4 different animals at the same time.

I think I have a rival.

The other day I'm chillin' at the bookstore surfing around with my laptop, looking like quite the pretentious coffee shop yuppie type when an old college buddy of mine drops by, looking just as yuppified with his fancy new shiny laptop.

We started talking about life, work, love, etc when he shows me some artwork he's doing for some client in LA. I have to admit it was some pretty cool stuff and I noticed it was done in the same medium I've been experimenting with for the past couple of weeks. So I pulled up some artwork of my own for him to look at... it's only natural right? "You show me yours, I'll show you mine" type of thing.

Well after looking at it, his expression kind of went blank as he looked it up and down. I asked him what he thought, he said "it's pretty good", but he said it like it was almost too painful to say.
Well after chatting for a half hour longer we said our good byes.

The next morning I get an attached email from him that simply said "check THIS out". That's exactly how he wrote it, emphasising "that" with bold caps.

Attached to the email was a illustration that admittedly was 10 times better than anything I could do in this particular medium. In fact it was downright beautiful.
What was the point of sending it to me out of the blue like that and why did he go through the extra effort of putting "this" in bold caps??

Is he threatened by me? I've only been working in this medium for two weeks while he's been doing it for eight years. Was this his way of putting me in my place?
Come to think of it, he's always said that he admires how quickly I can learn a new art style, but this was back when I was working in a completely different medium than his.

Maybe he's afraid that I'll surpass him at his own game and I'll "horn in" on his action.

Well if he sent me this pic to discourage me, then he'll be really disappointed when I use it as motivation to become even better. I don't really care if I surpass him or not, but he's given me a goal nevertheless.

NO RETREAT! NO SURRENDER!!

A personal message to a certain somebody:

I don't give up easily, especially if it's something worth fighting and sacrificing for. I'll abide by now and respect certain boundaries, allow wounds to heal, emotions to mend. No matter what tests the gods throw my way, no matter how monumental the labors may be there will be NO RETREAT! NO SURRENDER!!

I love saying that.

Thank you, Cheryl!

Thank you for talking me out of writing a potentially very damaging post about somebody I care a lot for during one of my male ego "rages". God knows my usual impulsive posting on this blog has gotten me in trouble with people before, but they don't really mean that much to me compared to her. SHE knows who I'm talkin' 'bout!

Anyway, thanks again! I owe you one.

Taken for granted.

Sheeeesh! It's about friggin' time! For some odd reason I've been having a bitch of a time logging into my blog, but all is well now.

Okay, something I've noticed as far as relationships go is that the more you make yourself unavailable to someone the more they find you attractive, but giving them love and affection (without being clingy) everyday tends to drive them away.

It's like some kid who has ignored a perfectly good toy for months until mom or dad come along to take it to goodwill and suddenly that toy becomes the best thing in the universe to the kid as he kicks and screams to hold onto it.

Now this isn't anything new, I know. It's a typical story of people taking things and other people for granted, I've been guilty of doing this a few times, but why do we do it? Why can't we appreciate that shiny little toy while we still have it? Why can we not see how much something or someone means to us until they're about to leave our lives forever?
Aren't we better than some snot nosed kid?

Sometimes people get lucky-- sometimes they see the light and manage to hold on to that special "someone" and treat it with the respect they deserve, but a lot of times it's just too little too late and they have lost them forever.

If you do have a special little somebody that you don't treat as well as you should, stop being such a selfish motherfucker, cut the BULLSHIT and let them know how special they are because they aren't going to be around forever.

Okay the conclusion of the post has almost nothing to do with the introduction, but at least SOME kind of point was made dammit!

Recycling Exes

Everyone knows that when you break up with some chick or dude that the natural reaction is to get together with a bunch of your friends and proceed to bash the hell out of them, berate and chastise every little thing about them that's ever annoyed you even though at the time you used to think that it was so cute. Hell, it's pretty much tradition to tear down the mile high pedestal you had built for your "soul mate" throughout the relationship.

Of course you have those extremely rare break ups where there is absolutely no animosity or malice involved. You actually look back on your former love and have nothing but fond and loving memories of them, but for some reason or another, it just didn't work out between you two.


Try as you might, you just can't come up with a feasible subject to rake them over the coals with... there's just nothing there.
For people who are new at this and are used to partaking in the age old tradition of bashing the ex, this may be a difficult experience for you to adjust to, but you've got to have SOME sort of release right??

Well that's where recycling your ex comes in! Sure, the most current ex may be perfect in almost every way, but I'm sure there are a least a dozen more who are pieces of shit! Hell I'm sure they've got enough flaws to spare!
Yeah, it may seem odd to your friends listening to you bitch about someone you dated four or five years ago, but that's not important.

You get to keep all those loving memories of your perfect former beloved while satisfying your need to vent and bitch about a worthless fucking ex who made your life miserable.


Then again you could try out just appreciating the fact that you don't have any negative thoughts about the ex and do away with the ranting and raving altogether-- that'll work too.

Stupid ass names

This is a small issue that just keeps bugging me. It's a form of child abuse, imo, to decide your son should have the name "Laurie" or "Shirley", for instance. Yes, those are real examples....guys named "Shirley" and "Laurie". Of all the masculine choices for names out there, even things that are completely made up....why go that route? It doesn't make sense, and only points out the undeniable fact that the parent is an inconsiderate asshole. I'm sure there's some kind of legal limitations, right? I'm sure I couldn't just name my son "Idiot Whore" or "Douchebag Jones".

There's outright stupid choices as well, such as "Keedryn" or "Lantrivet", or "LaQuacious"....but lately I've been more concerned about the "girly names for guys" issue. Why voluntarily put your son through something like that? For the sake of being original, you'd force your son into a lifetime of humiliation? Like already stated, that automatically means you're a worthless excuse for a parent, imo. Fortunately, my parents had some sense, and gave me a normal name.

That brings up the other end of the spectrum, the extreme common names:

Utterly bland names like "David Smith" or "Michael"whatever. Still, I'd rather have that than go thru life as a male named Shirley, Audry, Laurie, or Stacey(there's an actor named "Stacey Keach"...despite how macho he is, it is still a girl's name...it's usually a hot girl's name too, e.g. "Stacey Keibler"/) On the other hand...there's common named folks who became famous, such as John Williams(only the absolute greatest modern composer of movie soundtracks)

The names also put a strain on the potential for professional success. Future potential employers aren't likely to take a "Divonte" or "BarQuise" as seriously as they would a "Keith", Alexander, or "Richard". So on top of dooming your child to humiliation all thru the school years....you've also placed him into a constant uphill battle with regard to career later in life. Again, this proves a parent to be a real grade-a douche.

I knew a guy in school named "Sir Crease"(*note--the 2 words there; that was the first name.)....what the hell is that? Come on now. I could imagine being angry at mom and dad if I was named "Linda" or "Tiffany" despite being a male....oh they'd never hear the end of it....and I'd change my name asap.

The super TB asshole

This guy is unbelievable. I should start out by saying he's a personal injury lawyer.....so any moronic action from this guy should really be a surprise to no one.

In a nutshell....
*He's diagnosed in Atlanta with multi-drug resistant TB.
*At that point he's told NOT TO TRAVEL.
*He travels on a trans-atlantic flight to Greece.
*He then travels from Greece to Italy.
*The CDC in the interim confirms that his infection is XDR TB (meaning resistant to ALL KNOWN drugs used to treat TB). Not to mention that regular TB is air-borne and extremely contagious.
*CDC tracks this guy down in Italy. Tells him they're coming to get him in a CDC-chartered private plane.
*He gives the CDC the middle finger and travels (via another trans-atlantic public flight) to Canada.
*He flies deliberately to Canada (and not the USA) because he knows he's on a "no fly" list into the US.
*Travels from Canada to the USA via car.

Well.... wow... personally I think this guy should be tossed into a furnace. Not only did he have TB, but he had super turbo TB for fuck's sake!
If that wasn't ridiculous enough, next thing you know he's being interviewed on freakin' news! Was he in a special air tight cell deep inside a bunker? Hell no, it looked like he was a hotel room, the only thing separating the reporter from his disease ridden mouth is a fucking hankerchief .
You would think the reporter would be wearing a full haz mat suit, but no... they couldn't be bothered to wear such a cumbersome apparatus, it might mess up their hair or obscure the audience's view of their carefully rehearsed expressions of 'concern' or 'sympathy'

God, I just don't understand people sometimes.

Just dissect his ass for study and toss his carcass into the furnace already!

This is precisely why I don't like to fly, on every flight you will always have that one passenger coughing up a lung throughout the entire trip and there's not a damn thing you can do about it. Sure, maybe it's the dry recycled air or maybe...just maybe it freaking SUPER TB!!!
Everyone panic!!!!!