personal space

I swear my co-worker has NO idea what this means. This person just barges into my office with that loud ass voice of their's and just makes themselves at home, messing with my shit. Never mind that I'm clearly working on a project. I'm very surprised this person has a significant other. Living with this ass would drive me insane.

Strange dream

I had a rather odd dream last night. I was hanging with this girl in my apartment whom I believe was my girlfriends since she was practically everything I was looking for physically and personality wise. Then suddenly, we're both on the living room floor of my parents' house. Sitting on the couch in front of us was my dad and my grandmother (who passed away 15 years ago!). Well for some strange reason my "girlfriend" was wearing nothing but a bed sheet and yapping away on her cell phone, seemingly oblivious to the situation. My dad asks me who the young lady was and I for the life of me couldn't remember her name. Here's a girl whom I'm living with, who is supposed to be the love of my life and I can't remember her name! I asked her to help me out and she gave me this weird look, laughed and continued talking on the phone. My dad and grandmother continued to just sit there with blank looks on their faces. Then my grandmother just says "I like her." That's when I woke up. Sheesh! What the hell was that all about??!

bummed

Man, I can't shake this feeling of just being....blah. I really don't have any motivation to do anything. I think I need some kind of change, but I don't have a clue of what that is. blah....

and the bitching continues....

Oh yeah, I went to a cookout on Friday where you actually had to bring your own meat?! Sheesh, how ghetto is that! Anyway, I brought a couple of bratwurst since I haven't had any for so long and it was my cheat day. The girls were pretty cool, save one. Good god, I was really getting sick of her "sausage jokes" at my expense. The first couple of times were funny, but after the 43rd time, I just wanted to punch the bitch. Jeez, how freakin' annoying can you get. To top it all off, I think she was flirting with me. Too bad I don't go for the uneducated ignorant types.

It was cool talking to Teri again after all this time and we stayed up until 1am just talking about life and all that crap until I got bored and left. I suppose it could've been worse.

meh

What a craptacular weekend. I'm stuck in a rut. Once again I did another tour of the Knoxville night life and went to the exact same places as before filled with the exact same people. 4620 used to be cool when nobody knew about it, but ever since they got their big new sign, it's starting to look and feel like another Micheal's. That's a shame because that was the only public place besides the bookstore where I could just relax.

I've really gotta do something about this.



On a brighter note, I spent Sunday going to see Dawn of the Dead with my sister as well as have dinner with her and we caught up and everything so that's always cool. I asked her if her daughter was a zombie would she be able to shoot her. I was surprised at how quickly she said yes. Her reasoning being that she would no longer be her daughter. Good point, but that's still gotta be rough!

Kinda feel bad since I skipped my kickboxing class and instead had some nice greasy deep fried food at Fud Druckers. First time I've ever been in there, but it's a pretty nice restaurant. I have to keep that in mind whenever I get a girlfriend or something. Stranger things have happened.

Oh well......

ME time.

Ever since officially starting my "summer workout" program which involves me doing cardio 4 times a week, I haven't had any energy to do anything other than concentrate on ME. Yep, this is going to be the summer of RADFORD I tells ya! Gonna be doing some traveling around and experience some new things. Hell, maybe I'll even by a widescreen TV! Who knows what I'll do! It's the summer of RADFORD!!

Oh yeah, I've officially dropped Tanz as a friend. I never realized how much of an incredible pain in the ass this needy chick is until I stopped talking to her for almost a month and discovered a great weight had been lifted from my back! Ahhh, this is what the summer of RADFORD is all about! RADFORD!!!

Working out in paradise

I love the south courtsouth gym. No crowds. No yappy girls who hog up the machines while talking on their cell phones, no fat behemoths blocking the entire hallway, no meatheads hitting on every broad within site and no scantily clad vixens to distract me from having a good workout. Well, there was one there, but there was ONLY one so it wasn't hard to ignore her.

Yep, had a pretty darn good workout to say the least.

Working out in paradise

I love the south courtsouth gym. No crowds. No yappy girls who hog up the machines while talking on their cell phones, no fat behemoths blocking the entire hallway, no meatheads hitting on every broad within site and no scantily clad vixens to distract me from having a good workout. Well, there was one there, but there was ONLY one so it wasn't hard to ignore her.

Yep, had a pretty darn good workout to say the least.

Loud kids

Man, it sounds like a freakin day care at work today. Seems like every baby here has decided to cry their lungs out for no good reason other than irritate the hell outta me. What did I ever do to them?? sigh......

Introductions at da gym

I finally talked to a girl in my kickboxing class whose been taking them about as long as I have. I hadn't seen her in awhile so I asked her where she's been. She told me she's been going to classes at other gyms and she's been slacking off a bit. I noticed she was wearing some baggy sweats which is a far cry from the rather form fitting clothes she normally wears. She says she's really outta shape is trying to get back to form for the summer. From what I could see, she looked pretty good, but I can speak from experience, that no matter how many people tell you that you look good, if you don't think you do then you're never going to believe them until YOU think you looke good. Anyway, the conversation was brief since we were both in the middle of a workout and I shook her hand and told her it was nice to be formally introduced to her and she said likewise and it didn't really feel like an introduction since she sees me all the time. Good point. Oh well, I'll just have to wait and see if I have another "girl buddy" or not.

Dawn of the DEAD!

Man, this movie ROCKED! I thoroughly enjoyed myself! Finally, a GOOD zombie flick for the 21st century! I was going to see this with Lonnie and Kate,but due to some miscommunication, that didn't happen. I did see it with my mom though and that was pretty cool since she loves horror movies about as much as I do! Reminded me of the old days when both of us would go see horror movies together when I was in middle and high school! Good stuff!

Friday night

Okay, I finally got the time to post now! Alright, on friday, I decided to do another solo tour of the knoxville night scene since I didn't feel like sitting around looking a movies all night. First stop: 4620. As usual, I had a pretty cool time listening to the music even though at first there was standing room only for awhile, but I managed to find a seat anyway. I was also distracted by a rather tall busty woman, but in true 4620 fashion she was with a "bitch pack." ugh...

After that I went over to the Old City and visited Hannah's. As usual the place was crowded as hell so I went upstairs where I ran into a friend of mine as she was walking down with about 4 beer bottles in her arms. We said hi and she invited me to meet her and her friends downstairs whenever I was done upstairs. I agreed. Well upstairs was dead for some reason which I couldn't understand why. It's dance floor was so much bigger than downstairs. Anyway, eventually I went downstairs into the mob. I scanned the crowd for awhile from and elevated portion of the bar and then I spotted my friend and her boyfriend getting into what looked like a little fracus with some goofy looking dude and his girlfriend. I have to admit, even though she's only about 4 feet tall, my friend was in this guys face and wouldn't back down. Wish I could read lips. I would've had her back, but it was pretty crowded and I was wearing a new shirt and I didn't wanna spill beer on it or anything plus my old football injury was acting up....yeah. Anyway, nothing happened (at least I don't think) and I pretty much lost interest in Hannah's after that.

Next I went over to Barley's, but didn't stay too long since some annoying hippie looking bluegrass dude was playing some god awful music, but the college crowd seemed to enjoy it.

Eventually I wandered over to Manhatten's and saw this very attractive young lady sitting at the entrance with her head between her knees. I asked if she was okay, she looked up and smiled and said yes and thanked me for asking. I went on insided to look at the game. I noticed the chick walk back in to go towards the back and was bitching at her drunken, slacker loser of a boyfriend, but he just blew her off and continued drinking with his friends. She went back out and sat back down. Kind of a shame seeing a nice looking girl like that being treated like crap. Then again, she could be a nagging drama queen for all I know. Oh well....

Went back outside and noticed a crowd outside of Hannah's. Apparently the bouncers had this guy pinned down for some reason. Hell, even bouncers from Tonic and Fiction came down to help. Well, I stood around to see what this guy looked like to have 6 or 8 bouncers hold him down, fully expecting some hulking mass of muscle. WRONG. It turned out to be some scrawny looking kid who looked like he was 15 years old or something! WTF??! Give me a break! Big bad bouncers feeling mighty good about themselves, beating up a little kid like that. Anyway, he obviously didn't do anything too bad since the cops let him go. Whatever...

Anyway, after that little piece of entertainment, I decided to call it a night.

bike ride

oh yeah. I rode my bike from my apartment to the Old City for the hell of it. Pretty nice ride.

The Old City

Went to Hannah's in the Old City to check out the new second floor. Nothing but drunken white college kids making asses out of themselves. I think I was only one out of several minorities there. I like my clubs to have diversity. Needless to say I didn't stay long.

Later, i wound up at Barley's and met a couple of girls named Erica and Melissa. Nice enough, i guess, but they had a lot of baggage when it came to.... everything. Sheesh, nobody wants to hear that crap, especially people you just meet. I understand the need to vent and rant, that's why I have this blog. Oh well, to each his own. Besides, they were smokers anyway. I chatted with them a little while more before heading home where now I battle a serious case of insomnia....joy.

4620

After my little stint at the coke and poke I went over to 4620 to listen to some music and get the stench of Micheals off my body. Pretty nice band and the crowd there was much more civil. Of course, as always, 90 percent of the patrons were annoyingly happy couples and bitch packs. Wasn't there to score anyway, just wanted to listen to some tunes. I saw this cute girl there with dreadlocks, but there were already two guys falling over themselves for her attention. Not my style. After the last set, I decided to split thus continuing my tour of duty in the k-town night life.

The 'ol coke n' poke

I went to Micheal's tonight after what seemed to be years after my last visit out of sheer boredom. When i'm bored I do stupid atypical things.... this little trip was one of them. My god whatta shit hole. I don't know how anyone could have fun in that smoke filled, dangerously over crowded meat market. Good luck trying to dance there since the dancefloor is about the size of my living room. Lord....it was kind of funny seeing all these "players" putting the moves on the ladies.

All I could think about is how many of these people have STDs and thinking that actually made me laugh out loud. I think some broad thought I was checking her out and smiled at me, I just ignored her.

I saw someone there I actually knew, Curt who used to work at Fiction. He asked me if I was having fun and I told him hell no. I asked him why wasn't he at Fiction and he simply said he was getting too old for that. He's only a year younger than me. Oh well... After 30 minutes I decided to kiss my 5 bucks good bye and got the hell outta there. ick..... I need to take a shower.

The dead are coming!

Dawn of the Dead opens next week and I am, like, soooo there! I read that they are actually going to show the first 10 minutes of the movie on USA network around 10 or 10:30. Although, I don't have cable, I do have access to it, via the health club! Can't wait!

What a brilliant marketing idea, give the audience a little taste of the goods and just when it's getting good, CUT THEM OFF! By the time opening day comes around, you'll have hundreds of people lining up to see what happens next! What a cock tease!



Oh well... back to work.

Sick

This sucks. I'm sick. I feel like crap. I knew waking up on Monday morning I was going to be sick. Sure enough, I was right. Good news though: I finally got my Zombie Survival Guide back! Bad news: I'm exhibiting symptoms of Solanum, the virus responsible for creating the undead. Body aches, chills, headache, and dry cough. All symptoms of Solanum. I told Lisa I was counting on her to kill me before I returned as one of the undead to which she enthusiastically agreed to, but I found out she didn't have a gun (what kind of Texan is she??). She suggested bashing me over the head with a blunt object, but she doesn't have the upper body strength for it and it wouldn't be a quick death for yours truly. She said Lonnie would probably do it. He probably would. In fact, he would probably enjoy it a little too much now that I think about it. Why are my friends so eagar to kill me??



Oh well. I guess I'll find out tomorrow morning if I am destined to join the ranks of the undead. This sucks. What really sucks though is being really horny and being too sick to do anything about it. Hunh... I'll blame the Nyquil for that outburst.

Hannah's

Well, when Tinah and the gang got to hannah's (with me tagging along) we went up to the newly opened 2nd floor dance floor which was pretty cool. What's even cooler than that, was that they were playing 80s music! The only type of music I'll dance to!

And dance I did! I danced with a couple of girls who I barely remember. All I know is that one of them danced with a cigarette, a beer and a purse in tow. It made her kinda limited on mobility and it made me look better. I finally found someone who was a worse dancer than me! I remember dancing by myself for a little while and a group of girls started dancing with me. I don't know if they were actually dancing WITH me or they just happended to be dancing near me. I was too blitzed to tell which. For the sake of my ego, I'm gonna go with the former.

I wasn't trying to hook up with anybody though. I was just concentrating on not falling on my ass. Besides, even if was there to pick up some ladies, I'd be shit outta luck since JJ sat next to me when he wasn't dancing. I don't know if I've said this before, but JJ is a good looking guy. I'm talking Lenny Kravitz good looking. I might as well have been invisible. The chicas were definately diggin' him. Of course I don't blame them. It's really too bad he doesn't have an older sister...Oh well.

Well after about 3 hours of dancing, I took off. No good byes or whatever, I just left. I guess I get a little more abrupt than usual when I'm drunk. I didn't go straight home though. I took a little nap in the office to sober up a little before I drove home. Woke up around 5am or so and finally went home. Pretty fun night... from what I can remember.

Tinah's b-day party

Last friday was Tinah's birthday part and I had a really good time. There was plenty of free pizza and junk food, not to mention beer. Mariell's boyfriend had some really crappy tequila, but that didn't stop me from taking about 3 or 4 shots of the stuff. Man, it was like swallowing kerosene, but I was going to have a good time dammit! He told me Tinah was holding on to the GOOD stuff (Petrone) until the little kiddies left. In the meantime, I shot the shit with him and Mariell as well as Jesse and Lauren, two people I haven't seen since the Christmas party. It was really cool to see Lauren again and once again we picked up where we left off, despite the fact that it had been months since we last saw each other. Maybe it was the booze goggles talking, but she looked REALLY good! I don't know if she's been working out or eating right or maybe it was what she was wearing, but she looked really good! Even Tinah complimented on her ass.... sheesh...only other women can get away with crap like that!
Jessica Stooksbury was there, too, but I really didn't talk to her much. I hardly ever see her and I'm not as close to her as I am with Lauren. Besides, the only thing Jessica wants to talk about is... Jessica. Same old story. But I have to admit she had lost a lot of weight since she used to work with me at Dmg and she was looking pretty good herself. Too bad she has a complete lack of an ass. It was pretty lacking before her weight loss, now it's pretty much non-existent.
I complimented on her losing the weight the right way: through proper diet and exercise and she said that I've gotten a lot more muscular over the years. Taken off guard by her compliment, I said that she had a lot less girth since the last time I saw her.... that didn't exactly come out right so I tried to weasel out of it by giving her a hug. Didn't work though. She just said that it was so obvious why I'm such a hit with the ladies. Ouch! Of course I could've brought up the fact that she persued a GAY guy for years, even following him to Chicago, but I didn't want things to turn ugly. Mariell and JJ pretty much told me I fucked up with that "girth" comment though... bah!
Speaking of self-absorbed bores, Jude was there as well and MAN... the girl has gained some pounds! Now I like my women with a few extra pounds on them, in fact, awhile back, I had a little crush on Jude... well, not her, but certain... parts of her. Anyway, this was a little too much, even for me. Last time I saw her she was on the Atkins diet. When she told me this, I KNEW this was going to happen. The Atkins diet is a joke, a scam, a con and it flat out doesn't work! Not only that, but it's extemely unhealthy! Yeah, you lose weight at first, but if you deviate from the diet just a little and BOOM! All your weight comes crashing back with interest! This is what happened with Jude. Yeah, I actually tried to tell her about it, but in typical Jude arrogance, she blew me off. Whatever, I don't wanna brag, but I do know what I'm talking about when it comes to proper health. Bottom line is: NO DIET WORKS WITHOUT EXERCISE! You can't just sit around the house, eating greasy fat foods all day and expect to be healthy! It's common since! This high protein/fat low carb crap is just a FAD!!! IT DOESN'T WORK!! Your body NEEDS carbs! It's all about balance and moderation, people! And don't forget EXERCISE!! There's no other way!
Jude found that out the hard way. I almost feel sorry for her..... almost.

Anyway, Tinah finally busted out the Petrone and I took a shot (later, I found out you are supposed to savor it) and it was MUCH better than that Ceurvo Gold that JJ had and it had no kerosene after taste!
I just realized something... the past three times I've hung out with Lauren, I've always been drunk and I've only been drunk 3 time including this year and last year. Quite a coincidence.

After the party, Lauren and Jesse parted ways and I ended up going to Hannah's with Tinah's group and that is a story for another time.

STD test results

Well, my STD test results came in the other day and here are the results:



Gonorrhea- negative

Syphilis- negative

Chlamydia- negative

HSV1 (oral herpes)- negative

HSV2 (genital herpes)- negative

HPV (genital warts)- negative

Hepatitis C- negative

Hepatits B- negative

HIV- negative



Well it looks like I have an all around clean bill of health. Which is surprising since I love the hookers.

NO CHICKS ALLOWED

Well, it's almost been a week since I let two chicks spend the weekend in my apartment. My god..... talk about a living nightmare. I swear this reminded me why I only see Tanz once or twice every other month. This broad was driving me crazy with her immature pouting bitching and whining.



Anyway, it all started off fine and dandy, we had a good time on Friday night and we went to Tomato Head to celebrate her birthday, even though it took both of them 2 fucking hours to finally get ready! At Tomato Head, the conversation was soooo stimulating as they talked about what they could and couldn't eat, what had carbs, what was fattening, blah blah blah! It took them 45 minutes to finally decide!!! Geez, hanging with these broads was seriously cock blocking me all night! I saw several potentials, but I couldn't act on it since I was with these cows and Tanz always acts like a jealous girlfriend whenever I do scope other women. That alone scares the hell outta me! Geez! Get a fucking boyfriend!

I didn't realize the severity of my situation until later that night when I got out of bed and realized that they were still here...... my god..... they were still here!!



I got a little me-time on Saturday, as Tanz and her annoying friend did lord knows what and I got to watch the movie I rented earlier.... for awhile at least. The two broads came storming in and yackin' up a storm right in the middle of my movie!! It was like I wasn't even there! Then they had the nerve to tell me to turn it down! Yeah right.... THEN they started asking me where the best hair salon was around here! LIKE I FUCKING KNOW!!!! Anyway, being the helpful host that I am, I attempted to help them out by reading off names in the phone book, but they shot down every suggestion and looked at me like I was stupid, Then the dumb bitches finally realized that it was impossible to get an appointment on a freakin' SATURDAY. That didn't stop them from talking though..... they never got sick of that. All I wanted to do was watch my movie....



Later on, Tanz wanted to take her buddy to Fresh Market and Green Earth Emporium, two of my least favorite places and they wanted me to drive them. I asked Tanz why couldn't she drive and she said she'd be driving all day....boo hoo. I needed to return the movies anyway, so I drove their fat asses there. But not before dropping by Marble Slab. There was a huge line there with few hundred sugar-driven yuppie spawn running all over the place acting like morons and totally punking their worthless parents. Tanz and Crystal, being the gluttons they are decided to wait in line for they nice healthy ice cream as I sat in the patio, surrounded by these little bastards. 45 minutes later, they finally came out and once again start.....you guessed it.... TALKING!!! Once again, I didn't exist. When I did say something, I was totally ignored. Resisting the urge to kill everyone within eyesight, I went to Panera bread to escape the chaos.



Eventually, the two pains in the the ass finished their Ice Cream and then we spent a lovely hour at the Fresh Market....God... these two spent an hour looking at every single piece of food, spice or nick nack this store had and all they bought were a couple of canolies??? They store is barely bigger than my apartment!!!

Next we went to that hippie abortion of a store, Green Earth Emporium. I've never seen som much tacky, overpriced, useless JUNK in my life! 80 bucks for a curtain?? Yeah right! Well these broads spent an hour and a half at this place while I sat outside (The smell makes me wanna puke). After that time in there, the only thing they bought was a CARD.... a single frakkin' CARD!!!



I was greatly annoyed, but thankful it was over and then started to hurry over to Sam Goody. When Tanz realized that we weren't going to my place and found out we were going to the mall, this broad had the nerve to start complaining??? She wanted me to drop them off, but I wanted to get there before dark, well Tanz instantly reverted to a 8 year old and started pouting and giving me a dose of "silent treatment". Like this was gonna work on me! Maybe if she was a girlfriend and the possibility her never having sex with me again, that tactic might work, but I find Tanz as desirable as sack of cow dung.

When we got there, I left her pouting hippie ass in the car and invited her friend to come along, which I knew she wanted to, but she decided to stick with Tanz. I spent a good 20 minutes at Sam Goody before I realized they didn't have anything new and went back to the car full of attitude.



I decided to stop by Books A Million to check out the new graphic novels (comics) despite the bitching of Tanz. Once again I left both their asses in the car.

I had just finished reading all the GNs when Tanz and Crystal asked me if I was ready to go. I was, and so we left.



When we got to my place I returned my sis's voicemail and started shooting the shit in my room and I noticed the "ladies" packing up their crap. I assumed they were going to visit Tanz's family like they said earlier and didn't pay much attention. After I got off the phone and they were gone, I realized their tooth brushes were gone as well as all their other girly shit. I was overjoyed at first, knowing that I didn't have to deal with these broads again. Then I realized that they left without even saying THANK YOU?? After all my preparation, canceled plans and tolerance?? They came in here, ate my food, slept on my couches used all my shit, acted rude as hell, and they just left without even saying THANK YOU!? Then I remembered that they were GONE so I started feeling happy again.



They call me later on or should I say Tanz gets Crystal to call me since she's still pouting (it's been 7 hours). So I (still trying to be civil) ask them if they are having a good time and she says they can't find anything to do. They say every place is crawling with frat daddys and such.

I suggested 4620, but I could hear Tanz whining about there being a dress code and how it was such a stupid suggestion. I suggested to Crystal they probably couldn't get in anyway, since Tanz likes to dress like a hippie, in other words, like SHIT and 4620 has a dress code. I knew full well that tanz could hear, btw, and she told Crystal to hang up since she didn't want to hear me talk trash about her on her own phone, but it's totally alright for her to talk shit about me. Anyway, I told CRYSTAL to have a nice time and hung up.



I've put up with Tanz's shit for 4 years now, hoping one day that she'll change, but it obvious she isn't so I don't think I'm going to be friends with her anymore. The only reason I've kept her around this long is because I only have to deal with her every other month, but now I think that that's too much Tanz time. Fuck her.

sheesh!

Man.... I've been trapped in banner making HELL! I barely have time to post on here anymore. When will the maddness stop!! If I didn't have Mariell to torture, I don't know what I'd do! Heh..... I love that little midget girl!