NO CHICKS ALLOWED

Well, it's almost been a week since I let two chicks spend the weekend in my apartment. My god..... talk about a living nightmare. I swear this reminded me why I only see Tanz once or twice every other month. This broad was driving me crazy with her immature pouting bitching and whining.



Anyway, it all started off fine and dandy, we had a good time on Friday night and we went to Tomato Head to celebrate her birthday, even though it took both of them 2 fucking hours to finally get ready! At Tomato Head, the conversation was soooo stimulating as they talked about what they could and couldn't eat, what had carbs, what was fattening, blah blah blah! It took them 45 minutes to finally decide!!! Geez, hanging with these broads was seriously cock blocking me all night! I saw several potentials, but I couldn't act on it since I was with these cows and Tanz always acts like a jealous girlfriend whenever I do scope other women. That alone scares the hell outta me! Geez! Get a fucking boyfriend!

I didn't realize the severity of my situation until later that night when I got out of bed and realized that they were still here...... my god..... they were still here!!



I got a little me-time on Saturday, as Tanz and her annoying friend did lord knows what and I got to watch the movie I rented earlier.... for awhile at least. The two broads came storming in and yackin' up a storm right in the middle of my movie!! It was like I wasn't even there! Then they had the nerve to tell me to turn it down! Yeah right.... THEN they started asking me where the best hair salon was around here! LIKE I FUCKING KNOW!!!! Anyway, being the helpful host that I am, I attempted to help them out by reading off names in the phone book, but they shot down every suggestion and looked at me like I was stupid, Then the dumb bitches finally realized that it was impossible to get an appointment on a freakin' SATURDAY. That didn't stop them from talking though..... they never got sick of that. All I wanted to do was watch my movie....



Later on, Tanz wanted to take her buddy to Fresh Market and Green Earth Emporium, two of my least favorite places and they wanted me to drive them. I asked Tanz why couldn't she drive and she said she'd be driving all day....boo hoo. I needed to return the movies anyway, so I drove their fat asses there. But not before dropping by Marble Slab. There was a huge line there with few hundred sugar-driven yuppie spawn running all over the place acting like morons and totally punking their worthless parents. Tanz and Crystal, being the gluttons they are decided to wait in line for they nice healthy ice cream as I sat in the patio, surrounded by these little bastards. 45 minutes later, they finally came out and once again start.....you guessed it.... TALKING!!! Once again, I didn't exist. When I did say something, I was totally ignored. Resisting the urge to kill everyone within eyesight, I went to Panera bread to escape the chaos.



Eventually, the two pains in the the ass finished their Ice Cream and then we spent a lovely hour at the Fresh Market....God... these two spent an hour looking at every single piece of food, spice or nick nack this store had and all they bought were a couple of canolies??? They store is barely bigger than my apartment!!!

Next we went to that hippie abortion of a store, Green Earth Emporium. I've never seen som much tacky, overpriced, useless JUNK in my life! 80 bucks for a curtain?? Yeah right! Well these broads spent an hour and a half at this place while I sat outside (The smell makes me wanna puke). After that time in there, the only thing they bought was a CARD.... a single frakkin' CARD!!!



I was greatly annoyed, but thankful it was over and then started to hurry over to Sam Goody. When Tanz realized that we weren't going to my place and found out we were going to the mall, this broad had the nerve to start complaining??? She wanted me to drop them off, but I wanted to get there before dark, well Tanz instantly reverted to a 8 year old and started pouting and giving me a dose of "silent treatment". Like this was gonna work on me! Maybe if she was a girlfriend and the possibility her never having sex with me again, that tactic might work, but I find Tanz as desirable as sack of cow dung.

When we got there, I left her pouting hippie ass in the car and invited her friend to come along, which I knew she wanted to, but she decided to stick with Tanz. I spent a good 20 minutes at Sam Goody before I realized they didn't have anything new and went back to the car full of attitude.



I decided to stop by Books A Million to check out the new graphic novels (comics) despite the bitching of Tanz. Once again I left both their asses in the car.

I had just finished reading all the GNs when Tanz and Crystal asked me if I was ready to go. I was, and so we left.



When we got to my place I returned my sis's voicemail and started shooting the shit in my room and I noticed the "ladies" packing up their crap. I assumed they were going to visit Tanz's family like they said earlier and didn't pay much attention. After I got off the phone and they were gone, I realized their tooth brushes were gone as well as all their other girly shit. I was overjoyed at first, knowing that I didn't have to deal with these broads again. Then I realized that they left without even saying THANK YOU?? After all my preparation, canceled plans and tolerance?? They came in here, ate my food, slept on my couches used all my shit, acted rude as hell, and they just left without even saying THANK YOU!? Then I remembered that they were GONE so I started feeling happy again.



They call me later on or should I say Tanz gets Crystal to call me since she's still pouting (it's been 7 hours). So I (still trying to be civil) ask them if they are having a good time and she says they can't find anything to do. They say every place is crawling with frat daddys and such.

I suggested 4620, but I could hear Tanz whining about there being a dress code and how it was such a stupid suggestion. I suggested to Crystal they probably couldn't get in anyway, since Tanz likes to dress like a hippie, in other words, like SHIT and 4620 has a dress code. I knew full well that tanz could hear, btw, and she told Crystal to hang up since she didn't want to hear me talk trash about her on her own phone, but it's totally alright for her to talk shit about me. Anyway, I told CRYSTAL to have a nice time and hung up.



I've put up with Tanz's shit for 4 years now, hoping one day that she'll change, but it obvious she isn't so I don't think I'm going to be friends with her anymore. The only reason I've kept her around this long is because I only have to deal with her every other month, but now I think that that's too much Tanz time. Fuck her.