Fascinating

I'm sitting at my o9ffice computaer after spedning mostof the night drinking with some friends of myine wishinga frined good luck on his new teaching job. I spent longer out drinking than ai thought i would and I am thoraouthyly drunk.

SoI thought it would be interesting to see how I would put a post in my bogtl while I am drunk. Right now I look forwared to reading this in the morning to see how far gone I was this night. I think I danced with a chick but it could'be been a guy in drage. I dudnno I was just enjoying the music so I dont give a damen.

Even though I think i'm good to drive I know for a fact that I'm not. I'll rpoably end up spending theing night in the office or stay here long enough to sober up. Its scary that people actually go out and drive in this condition or worse. Hell I can barely keep track of the key board let alone a dricing an actualy fvehicle.

Let this be a lsesson to all you kids... don't dringk and drive!!217-0

May be I'll triy on th draw a picture while drunk, that should be interesting god, I ahve to hbe in corth caraliona tomorrow morningt... I hope i cna man ke it.

time to starty dringking some water and pissing my ailment out of my body. lateryalll.

Volleyball confusion

that's what you want to see

So I'm sitting here watching woman's beach volleyball and something troubles me.
Why are the commentators..... talking?? Matter of fact why are they there at all?? Why do feel the need to drone on about the players' stats, history, opinions strategies, etc??
Why do they interview the players from the neck up? Why does the camera focus on their faces at all? Why are they even allowed to talk?

What's up the bizarre camera angles where they zoom in ABOVE the waist? I don't understand why they opt for a SIDE view angle when the players are bent over. There is a shocking lack of genuine rear view angles in women's beach volleyball, it makes me feel a little cheated that I'm not getting every possible angle of Misty May's well rounded.... talents.

When I think more about it the annoying audience really isn't needed either.

These are just the little things that prevent me from fully enjoying the fine and respected sport of Women's beach volleyball.

True story

When I was in 4th grade my class went on a field trip to the museum. Since we were all little bastards, we would run around and play tag when the grown ups were not looking.

The kid that was "it" decided to run after me to tag me, so I ran away into what I thought was another room. Turns out the other room was a wall painted to look like some outdoor Dinosaur exhibit, so I ran face first into a wall, like Wile E. Coyote except I ended up with a huge not on my forehead and probably had a concussion, but kids were tough back in my day and I shook it off and continued running around the museum like the demon child I was.

I bet if that happened today the kid would be immediately taken to the hospital, the panicky parents would have sued the school, museum, teacher and anyone else who looked at them funny and the museum would have been deemed unsafe and shut down by homeland security.

bleh

A joke.

Okay here's a joke that might be old as sand, but I just heard it yesterday so it's new to me, so shut the hell up and listen:

How do you kill a circus?
You go for the juggler!! HAW!

That's fucking comedy gold right there, son!

Feel free to tell it to your friends... you know you will.

Ghost Hunting

So I was invited to, but declined (too tired and drunk) to go on a midnight ghost hunt in some spooky old house, not too far from where I live.
Turns out I missed on a pretty creepy experience as my friend gave me the details. I was both freaked out and envious at the same time! They said they got footage of the "spirit" which I have yet to see.

I love crap like this, it reminds me when I was in high school, hanging out with friends in the graveyard, going into creepy old houses with a ouiji board and swearing some unseen spirit was moving the arrow thing.

Looking back, the only thing encountered was probably a big healthy dose of asbestos, but it was fun at the time, especially that time we made some poor shmuck pee his pants. Over a decade later and we STILL give him a hard time about it, I even told his kids about it! Haw! Good times.

Anyway, I'm curious to joining this new group on one of their excursions with mixed reactions from friends and family.

One friend says it's such a stupid white thing to do. Black people already know the ghosts are there and thus feel no need to "find" them
My sister just called me a dork and act my age.

Oh, what the hell ever, I'm going regardless and I WILL fufill my lifelong dream of poking a ghost in the ass with a stick!!

Why? Why the hell not? I figure I have enough enemies on the mortal plain, time to start working on making some other worldly antagonists and nothing makes an enemy faster than poking them in the ass with a stick!

Dedicating songs

One thing that really irks me are people who use songs/music to express how they feel when they get into a fight with their significant other or want to tell them how much they mean to them.

What the fuck is that?? How emotionally inept do you have to be to use some god awful cliched pop song to tell someone how you are feeling. Oh boo hoo, so and so broke my heart and I really need to tell them how much they hurt me... I know! I'll play them some Avril Langverin--lanerine--lang whatever that canadian bitch's name is and maybe they'll understand.

Good god... what's even worse is when someone dedicates a song on the radio. Yeah, that's what I want to do... use some annoying douchebag dj as an intermediary for my personal relationships. Personally I'd be highly annoyed if some chick did that to me. If she has a problem with me or if she wants to tell me how much I mean to her then she'd damn well better tell me to my face. No matter how well intentioned the gesture may be, I don't need thousands of strangers knowing about my business.
If they HAVE to dedicate a song to me, it had better be a GOOD song for fuck's sake, I really don't want my relationship to be synonymous with Celine fucking Deon.

Ugh... this whole song dedication crap is right up there with people who quote random literary greats in an attempt to sound deeper than they are. Whoopdeedoo, you quoted Keats, you are so brilliant! But that's another story.