I was listenting to a friend of mine bitching about all these terrible things that seem to happen to her, particularly her love life and, as the incredibly attentive friend that I am, I listened. Then she asked me why she was such a "shit magnet" when it comes to men. Then I started thinking:
heh.... "shit magnets"... it would be funny to see crap literally following certain people around...the dude walks by, and then you see this little group of sentient turds sneaking around behind him. Then you wonder...just what did he do to piss off a group of turds? Or are the little shits just being assholes for no good reason? Or maybe there's a more sinister agenda going on. And....did they come from him...or someone else?
I ponder such things occassionally.
Monday, February 28, 2005
I'M BLACK? Thanks for reminding me.
Why do people go out of their way to label people, particularly when race is involved?
For example, I can't count all the times I've been referred to as so and so's BLACK friend or the BLACK guy or the BLACK student. That's so fucking retarded. Do people do this to remind themselves and me that we're different from each other? Gee thanks for the news flash! I was beginning to forget that I was indeed a black man. Thank god I have dip shits like this to constantly remind me of the fact. I can understand if someone asks for specific details or how it would help in identification purposes or if it's relevant to a story, but just to throw it out there like that? Come the fuck on!
No, I'm not talking about the politically correct bullshit either. One thing I can't stand is over sensitive pussies. I would rather have somebody say "the indian chick" rather than hear them go on for about 2 minutes describing every physical attribute trying oh so hard not to trip any racial "taboos". Common sense, people.
What I am talking about and what pissed me the hell off was when I went to some crap ass bakery on the first floor of my building a couple years ago to have them move their van that was blocking my car. Well this piece of shit dumbass gets all huffy about it and tells his manager, out loud for the world to hear that there's a BLACK guy out there asking to move their van. Keep in mind, the only two people there was a woman and myself. I don't think the manager would've confused us if the worker left out my ethnic origin. Needless to say I raised all sorts of hell and told them I didn't have time for their fucking racist attitudes and to move their fucking van. I think I cost them their one paying customer as she slinked slowly out the door. Fuck 'em. They shut down 5 months later anyway. Probably because of all the rat shit.
Meh... I'm tired and hungry.
For example, I can't count all the times I've been referred to as so and so's BLACK friend or the BLACK guy or the BLACK student. That's so fucking retarded. Do people do this to remind themselves and me that we're different from each other? Gee thanks for the news flash! I was beginning to forget that I was indeed a black man. Thank god I have dip shits like this to constantly remind me of the fact. I can understand if someone asks for specific details or how it would help in identification purposes or if it's relevant to a story, but just to throw it out there like that? Come the fuck on!
No, I'm not talking about the politically correct bullshit either. One thing I can't stand is over sensitive pussies. I would rather have somebody say "the indian chick" rather than hear them go on for about 2 minutes describing every physical attribute trying oh so hard not to trip any racial "taboos". Common sense, people.
What I am talking about and what pissed me the hell off was when I went to some crap ass bakery on the first floor of my building a couple years ago to have them move their van that was blocking my car. Well this piece of shit dumbass gets all huffy about it and tells his manager, out loud for the world to hear that there's a BLACK guy out there asking to move their van. Keep in mind, the only two people there was a woman and myself. I don't think the manager would've confused us if the worker left out my ethnic origin. Needless to say I raised all sorts of hell and told them I didn't have time for their fucking racist attitudes and to move their fucking van. I think I cost them their one paying customer as she slinked slowly out the door. Fuck 'em. They shut down 5 months later anyway. Probably because of all the rat shit.
Meh... I'm tired and hungry.
Friday, February 25, 2005
Random confession
I do a sexy runway model walk whenever I'm in a really good mood while imitating techno music.
The fucking Pope.
I read today that the pope is very very sick. This surprised me because I thought he died years ago. Actually he did die years ago and they're just using his body as a corpse puppet! It's true! People have been worshipping some crazy zombie pope for over a decade!
What's the big deal about the fucking pope anyway? Why do people worship this old walking corpse (well I guess he's not walking now) with such vigor? He's just some old dude who lives in a castle and wears a funny hat. Yet people literally kiss the ground he walks on! If he was the actual son of god or some other deity and performed actual miracles I could see the appeal, but he isn't and he doesn't. All he does is yammer on in latin and condones and/or condemns something. Wow. If i saw this old fart walking down the street, I would keep right on walking. I sure as hell wouldn't kneel to this bastard or kiss his fucking ring. Ugh...thinking about this makes my head hurt.
Get well soon, zombie pope!
What's the big deal about the fucking pope anyway? Why do people worship this old walking corpse (well I guess he's not walking now) with such vigor? He's just some old dude who lives in a castle and wears a funny hat. Yet people literally kiss the ground he walks on! If he was the actual son of god or some other deity and performed actual miracles I could see the appeal, but he isn't and he doesn't. All he does is yammer on in latin and condones and/or condemns something. Wow. If i saw this old fart walking down the street, I would keep right on walking. I sure as hell wouldn't kneel to this bastard or kiss his fucking ring. Ugh...thinking about this makes my head hurt.
Get well soon, zombie pope!
The twin towers
Okay so I'm sitting in my apartment, in my underwear, eating pizza, watching cableless television, trying to forget about a certain woman who moved to a certain state, a certain 3800 miles away. Then I stopped, looked around and said FUCK THIS! I was going to go out and do something besides drowning myself in Papa John's pizza.
Wasn't sure what that thing was and just drove aimlessly around for awhile until I wound up in a pub I used to frequent. There was some kind of funky bluegrass band playing and I found myself actually enjoying the music! I met a girl there who was pretty cool and we started talking and such. After the band was done, I still wanted to go somewhere with a live band and I pretty much kidnapped this girl to go with me to some random bar/restaurant to listen to the band and shoot some pool.
The band was warmed over monkey shit, but we did find a free table. Neither one of us had any change so I went to the bar to get some. There was a huge line of drunken college kids there and I got sick of waiting so I asked the nearest person to me for some change. That person happened to be a 6'1 amazon of a woman who later I found out was a volleyball player for UT and her teammate/friend who was also 6'1. There were pretty nice and they gave me change for my dollar, but they were also completely shit faced.
Anyway, they kind of invited themselves over to our pool table and started rambling on about everything. They were very attractive to say the least, but they just wouldn't shut up! The girl I was with and myself eventually called them the "Drunken twin towers". Eventually these two grew on me when they started talking about movies and how much they hated sorostitutes. That's when they were put on my cool list and I even took the time to learn their names. There's a first!
It was very amusing trying to translate the towers' random drunken ramblings as the night went on the the booze kept flowing. I considered making a move on one/both of them, especially since they were coming on to me periodically throughout the night but I didn't count it since they were painfully drunk. I dunno... taking advantage of drunk chicks, no matter how hot they are seems kind of desperate to me. I'm sure I'm probably the only male in the universe who thinks this way. Sigh... wouldn't be the first time.
3am eventually came around and I bid farewell to the twin towers and left with my kidnap victim. We hung out and yapped for awhile in the parking lot and went our separate ways.
Not a bad way to spend the night. I got out the apartment, enjoyed some live music and met some cool new people and got that certain woman out of my head for 10 whole minutes! A new record!!!
Wasn't sure what that thing was and just drove aimlessly around for awhile until I wound up in a pub I used to frequent. There was some kind of funky bluegrass band playing and I found myself actually enjoying the music! I met a girl there who was pretty cool and we started talking and such. After the band was done, I still wanted to go somewhere with a live band and I pretty much kidnapped this girl to go with me to some random bar/restaurant to listen to the band and shoot some pool.
The band was warmed over monkey shit, but we did find a free table. Neither one of us had any change so I went to the bar to get some. There was a huge line of drunken college kids there and I got sick of waiting so I asked the nearest person to me for some change. That person happened to be a 6'1 amazon of a woman who later I found out was a volleyball player for UT and her teammate/friend who was also 6'1. There were pretty nice and they gave me change for my dollar, but they were also completely shit faced.
Anyway, they kind of invited themselves over to our pool table and started rambling on about everything. They were very attractive to say the least, but they just wouldn't shut up! The girl I was with and myself eventually called them the "Drunken twin towers". Eventually these two grew on me when they started talking about movies and how much they hated sorostitutes. That's when they were put on my cool list and I even took the time to learn their names. There's a first!
It was very amusing trying to translate the towers' random drunken ramblings as the night went on the the booze kept flowing. I considered making a move on one/both of them, especially since they were coming on to me periodically throughout the night but I didn't count it since they were painfully drunk. I dunno... taking advantage of drunk chicks, no matter how hot they are seems kind of desperate to me. I'm sure I'm probably the only male in the universe who thinks this way. Sigh... wouldn't be the first time.
3am eventually came around and I bid farewell to the twin towers and left with my kidnap victim. We hung out and yapped for awhile in the parking lot and went our separate ways.
Not a bad way to spend the night. I got out the apartment, enjoyed some live music and met some cool new people and got that certain woman out of my head for 10 whole minutes! A new record!!!
Thursday, February 24, 2005
Date rape
I was having a rather pleasant conversation with a friend of a friend about the topic of date rape. He basically suggested that if a guy buys a chick dinner or anything else for that matter, she's obligated to pay him back with sex. He said he could "understand" why chicks get date raped when they refuse to honor their part of the "deal". The fucktard actually said this with a straight face.
What a load of shit. Whoever honestly thinks that is pretty ingnorant. I pay for my friend's meals if i have money and they don't, do I expect them to lend me their car later? hell no. I do it because they're my friend. Period.
As for chicks you buy dinner or some bullshit for, She doesn't owe you shit, and unless you make a agreement, any sort of "right" you think you have over someone is just a sad example of self delusion.
I could go on and on and on about how evil rape is and how rapists are one step above child molestors and should have certain body parts cut off and blah blah blah, but who hasn't heard all that shit before?
Dumb fucks who believe in forcing themselves upon women because they refuse to give it up because they bought them a fucking Big Mac simply have no game. Forget all the woman hating pyschobabble associated with these tards. The bottom line is, they have no self control and no game.
Yeah, I can see how incredibly frustrating it can be when you're getting all hot and turned on and hell, parts of you might even be naked and the the chick suddenly decides to stop. Well as they say, "NO means no" and you have two choices to make: Force her to have sex anyway OR do the alternative.... BEG.
Get on your hands and knees and plead with her to give you some lovin'! Don't let up either! Don't hold anything back! Cry like a 3 year old little girl at Chuckie Cheese! Grab on to her leg if you have to! If you can cry on cue, do so! Chicks can't resist a man who is on the verge of peeing his pants! Tell her you have Cancer. Tell her your mom has cancer, tell her that your dog has fucking cancer because everyone knows that CANCER=PUSSY! Something about the BIG C gets women hot! It's a scientifically proven fact! Something about endorphins or something. Sooner or later she'll get sick of your crying, her leg will start cramping up from dragging your sorry carcass around the room as she tries to get the hell outta there and she'll feel overwhelmed with lust from your whole cancer delimma. That's when she'll give you the almighty PITY FUCK!
Yes siree! You may not have any dignity left and you'll probably get a reputation as desperate loser, but at least you got a chick to fuck you when she didn't want to and you didn't have to rape her to do so.
Pathetic you say? Yeah.... like a FOX!
What a load of shit. Whoever honestly thinks that is pretty ingnorant. I pay for my friend's meals if i have money and they don't, do I expect them to lend me their car later? hell no. I do it because they're my friend. Period.
As for chicks you buy dinner or some bullshit for, She doesn't owe you shit, and unless you make a agreement, any sort of "right" you think you have over someone is just a sad example of self delusion.
I could go on and on and on about how evil rape is and how rapists are one step above child molestors and should have certain body parts cut off and blah blah blah, but who hasn't heard all that shit before?
Dumb fucks who believe in forcing themselves upon women because they refuse to give it up because they bought them a fucking Big Mac simply have no game. Forget all the woman hating pyschobabble associated with these tards. The bottom line is, they have no self control and no game.
Yeah, I can see how incredibly frustrating it can be when you're getting all hot and turned on and hell, parts of you might even be naked and the the chick suddenly decides to stop. Well as they say, "NO means no" and you have two choices to make: Force her to have sex anyway OR do the alternative.... BEG.
Get on your hands and knees and plead with her to give you some lovin'! Don't let up either! Don't hold anything back! Cry like a 3 year old little girl at Chuckie Cheese! Grab on to her leg if you have to! If you can cry on cue, do so! Chicks can't resist a man who is on the verge of peeing his pants! Tell her you have Cancer. Tell her your mom has cancer, tell her that your dog has fucking cancer because everyone knows that CANCER=PUSSY! Something about the BIG C gets women hot! It's a scientifically proven fact! Something about endorphins or something. Sooner or later she'll get sick of your crying, her leg will start cramping up from dragging your sorry carcass around the room as she tries to get the hell outta there and she'll feel overwhelmed with lust from your whole cancer delimma. That's when she'll give you the almighty PITY FUCK!
Yes siree! You may not have any dignity left and you'll probably get a reputation as desperate loser, but at least you got a chick to fuck you when she didn't want to and you didn't have to rape her to do so.
Pathetic you say? Yeah.... like a FOX!
Friday, February 18, 2005
This ever happen to you?
You just get out of the shower feeling clean, smelling good and refreshed, ready to take on the world. Right after you dry off however, you suddenly have the urge to take a huge dump. We're not talkin your typical slightly above average load, we're talking about a 20 pound monster shitbomb that feels like a litter of hippos is passing through your ass. And the smell...my god the smell! It's so intense that your fire alarm goes off, the downstairs neighbor's dog suddenly starts bleeding from the nose and goes into a seizure so violent it snaps it's own neck, two car alarms go off from the shockwave of funk pulsing from between your ass cheeks and the Terror Alert satus in your vicinity shoots up to RED.
Needless to say that clean and fresh feeling you had moments before is shot to hell. It's now replaced with a horrible feeling as if you crawled ten miles through an open sewer as a thousand birds hover over you, shitting on your head out of spite.
This happened to me the other night.
Needless to say that clean and fresh feeling you had moments before is shot to hell. It's now replaced with a horrible feeling as if you crawled ten miles through an open sewer as a thousand birds hover over you, shitting on your head out of spite.
This happened to me the other night.
Wednesday, February 16, 2005
"This kinda sucks."
I got to the airport for the big good bye and found out that I got there a full 3 hours early. I called her and found out she left a voicemail telling me that her flight would be arriving at around 1am.
She laughed at me of course and said she would would be there at around midnight since she wanted to chat with me more anyway. When she arrived, we sat on the nearest bench and just yapped away and made little observations about the different people, including a pilot and stewardess who obviously had a little sumthin' sumthin' goin' on! There was gonna be some mile high action going on that night! She noticed he had a ring on, too! Wooo hoo! Scandalous!
Anyway, it was time for her to go and we hugged each other. What started out as a gesture of affection turned into who could break the most ribs. Geez, that woman is strong. Well, a couple of cracked ribs later she walked away and said "This kinda sucks!". I said, "yeah, I know!" THAT'S when it got weird because a few weeks ago I had a dream that almost mirrored this situation exactly, except in the dream it was a train or bus station and it was a totally different girl. Anyway, the girl in the dream said the same thing, which I always thought was odd because "This kinda sucks" was this girl's fave catch phrase. I never told her about the dream. Once again, I have dreamt about the future! This is the fourth time this has happened! Too freaky!
Anyway, I waved good bye and drove home. No tears. No Hollywood ending with me running into the plane and declaring my love for her as passengers do a standing ovation as Micheal Bolton blares in the background. No. None of that bullshit. Just...good bye and a strong urge to eat some pancakes. Maybe later.
So she's gone. Don't know if she was THE ONE™, but she was a pretty strong contender for the role.
She's a good kid.
She laughed at me of course and said she would would be there at around midnight since she wanted to chat with me more anyway. When she arrived, we sat on the nearest bench and just yapped away and made little observations about the different people, including a pilot and stewardess who obviously had a little sumthin' sumthin' goin' on! There was gonna be some mile high action going on that night! She noticed he had a ring on, too! Wooo hoo! Scandalous!
Anyway, it was time for her to go and we hugged each other. What started out as a gesture of affection turned into who could break the most ribs. Geez, that woman is strong. Well, a couple of cracked ribs later she walked away and said "This kinda sucks!". I said, "yeah, I know!" THAT'S when it got weird because a few weeks ago I had a dream that almost mirrored this situation exactly, except in the dream it was a train or bus station and it was a totally different girl. Anyway, the girl in the dream said the same thing, which I always thought was odd because "This kinda sucks" was this girl's fave catch phrase. I never told her about the dream. Once again, I have dreamt about the future! This is the fourth time this has happened! Too freaky!
Anyway, I waved good bye and drove home. No tears. No Hollywood ending with me running into the plane and declaring my love for her as passengers do a standing ovation as Micheal Bolton blares in the background. No. None of that bullshit. Just...good bye and a strong urge to eat some pancakes. Maybe later.
So she's gone. Don't know if she was THE ONE™, but she was a pretty strong contender for the role.
She's a good kid.
Monday, February 14, 2005
I'm such a tool
Last night I did the unthinkable.... I cooked dinner for a woman!
This is an extradordinarily rare even that only occurs once in many many moons and it's usually for a girl whom I consider very special. Usually I'm dating said chick, but this is not the case. She does mean a lot to me however, well enough for me to don the cooking gloves once again. She had to bring her cookware over since all mine is walmart bought pieces of shit, I had forgotten how good of a cook I am! Guess it's like riding a bike or whatever. Damn I'm awesome.
Afterwards, we stayed up most of the night watching Hentai porn. Man, I'm gonna miss this girl when she's gone!
This is an extradordinarily rare even that only occurs once in many many moons and it's usually for a girl whom I consider very special. Usually I'm dating said chick, but this is not the case. She does mean a lot to me however, well enough for me to don the cooking gloves once again. She had to bring her cookware over since all mine is walmart bought pieces of shit, I had forgotten how good of a cook I am! Guess it's like riding a bike or whatever. Damn I'm awesome.
Afterwards, we stayed up most of the night watching Hentai porn. Man, I'm gonna miss this girl when she's gone!
Friday, February 11, 2005
Woman tears off Man's Nut sack!
ARTICLE
The one thing I really wonder about...how was this guy so lax on his nut-defenses? One of he prime directives of manhood is to always protect your "equipment", no matter the cost. Even if it came down to a saving a small child's life vs. protecting your "stuff", hey, that kid's just going to die.
Personally, my reflexes are on Spiderman's level when it comes to that....even moreso arond high-risk situations, such as animals(even if it's a little puppy, I'm always on guard), and small children. My TRA LA LA™ will not ever be hurt as long as I'm able to do anything about it. The very second she started to lose it, that should've been his cue.....nut-defense should've been upped to Red Alert status. At the very least, he could've headbutted her or gone for a Hannibal Lecter face-bite attack....the resulting pain would've interrupted her nut-grab finisher, and then he could go for an easy KO.
And this psycho bitch only got 2.5 years? Oh, and she's soooo sorry and traumatized by the whole ordeal? SHE'S traumatized by it? How touching. Tell you what, let the guy gouge out your ovaries with an ice cream scoop and we'll call it even. Fucking double standard strikes again.
The one thing I really wonder about...how was this guy so lax on his nut-defenses? One of he prime directives of manhood is to always protect your "equipment", no matter the cost. Even if it came down to a saving a small child's life vs. protecting your "stuff", hey, that kid's just going to die.
Personally, my reflexes are on Spiderman's level when it comes to that....even moreso arond high-risk situations, such as animals(even if it's a little puppy, I'm always on guard), and small children. My TRA LA LA™ will not ever be hurt as long as I'm able to do anything about it. The very second she started to lose it, that should've been his cue.....nut-defense should've been upped to Red Alert status. At the very least, he could've headbutted her or gone for a Hannibal Lecter face-bite attack....the resulting pain would've interrupted her nut-grab finisher, and then he could go for an easy KO.
And this psycho bitch only got 2.5 years? Oh, and she's soooo sorry and traumatized by the whole ordeal? SHE'S traumatized by it? How touching. Tell you what, let the guy gouge out your ovaries with an ice cream scoop and we'll call it even. Fucking double standard strikes again.
Wednesday, February 9, 2005
Fucking Neighbors (literally)
For the past couple of weeks, my downstairs neighbor, "Spider girl" has been getting laid. Good for her. Too bad I have to hear it every other fucking night. Actually it's not that bad. It's funny listening to the chick suddenly become so religious all of a sudden. I don't think God's name is mentioned that many times in the bible. So I'm thinking this guy must be really good or she's just humoring him, either way it fun to listen to. Sometimes she would make these crazy monkey sounds like "oooo! oooo! oooo! eeeee!" This made me laugh quite a lot. Oh yeah, it's also funny listening to the guy bust his nut because he sounds like some kind of walrus having a stroke: "OOaarrGh! OOOhhawah! UGhgnnah!!" Good god… I was just waiting for the sound of an ambulance. My only critique was the guy's rhythm was rather erratic and there wasn't enough shit talking. Kids…
I don't really have any room to talk. Ever since that infamous night of debauchery back in November with a rather vocal (and foul mouthed) partner, not to mention the room shaking aftershocks from our…um…aggressive style. Neighbor girl and her man are rather tame by comparison plus at least we didn't sound like an episode of Wild Kingdom. Heh. That would explain the weird looks she's been giving me. I wonder if she saw us on the patio that night? Hey, maybe we inspired her.
I don't really have any room to talk. Ever since that infamous night of debauchery back in November with a rather vocal (and foul mouthed) partner, not to mention the room shaking aftershocks from our…um…aggressive style. Neighbor girl and her man are rather tame by comparison plus at least we didn't sound like an episode of Wild Kingdom. Heh. That would explain the weird looks she's been giving me. I wonder if she saw us on the patio that night? Hey, maybe we inspired her.
Monday, February 7, 2005
Memories
So I'm doing a little early spring cleaning of my blog and I'm amazed at how detailed I chronicled the ordeal with the ex, starting in the April Archives and spanning all the way to October. I had recorded things and events that I had completely forgotten about.
Reading through these archives was very much like watching a bad horror movie. Yeah, things start out happy and care free in the beginning, but you just know that something BAD is gonna go down! Next thing you know, the shit hits the fan and you're yelling at the stupid blonde, big chested, co-ed slut for blindly going into the creepy dark basement where the chainsaw wielding psycho killer lies in wait. Yeah, that's exactly how it felt, except in this case, I'm playing the role of the stupid, blonde, big chested, co-ed slut.
One of the more annoying things I noticed is that I actually suspected what was going to happen in some of my posts. Instead of running out the front to safety like a SMART person would do, however, I continued stumbling blindly into the dark and creepy basement. I now understand the frustration of my friends and family felt as they tried to tell me the obvious. They may as well have been yelling at a movie screen.
So weird... it's like reading someone else's blog. I was in a totally different world back then. It seemed so long ago. So sweet, so trusting, so blissfully unaware. I could taste the vomit in the back in my throat as I read through that diabetes inducing junk. It also made me laugh a LOT!
Yeah, I could deny any of it ever happening, but there it is in black and white for the whole world to read. It would be even easier to destroy the evidence. But I decided against it. This can serve as a grim reminder of what could happen when I exclude good ol' common sense in ANY relationship.
Besides... it wasn't ALL doom and gloom. There were actually some pretty happy memories that I didn't mind reliving.
In case you haven't noticed I turned off the comments tab because I have no interest in this becoming another bitch fest for a bunch of Dr. Phil wanna bes, bitter exes and retards who've probably never even kissed a girl. Thank you.
Reading through these archives was very much like watching a bad horror movie. Yeah, things start out happy and care free in the beginning, but you just know that something BAD is gonna go down! Next thing you know, the shit hits the fan and you're yelling at the stupid blonde, big chested, co-ed slut for blindly going into the creepy dark basement where the chainsaw wielding psycho killer lies in wait. Yeah, that's exactly how it felt, except in this case, I'm playing the role of the stupid, blonde, big chested, co-ed slut.
One of the more annoying things I noticed is that I actually suspected what was going to happen in some of my posts. Instead of running out the front to safety like a SMART person would do, however, I continued stumbling blindly into the dark and creepy basement. I now understand the frustration of my friends and family felt as they tried to tell me the obvious. They may as well have been yelling at a movie screen.
So weird... it's like reading someone else's blog. I was in a totally different world back then. It seemed so long ago. So sweet, so trusting, so blissfully unaware. I could taste the vomit in the back in my throat as I read through that diabetes inducing junk. It also made me laugh a LOT!
Yeah, I could deny any of it ever happening, but there it is in black and white for the whole world to read. It would be even easier to destroy the evidence. But I decided against it. This can serve as a grim reminder of what could happen when I exclude good ol' common sense in ANY relationship.
Besides... it wasn't ALL doom and gloom. There were actually some pretty happy memories that I didn't mind reliving.
In case you haven't noticed I turned off the comments tab because I have no interest in this becoming another bitch fest for a bunch of Dr. Phil wanna bes, bitter exes and retards who've probably never even kissed a girl. Thank you.
Saturday, February 5, 2005
My personal hell
Sometimes I'm haunted by the fact that I'm too good looking. Then I look at all the ugly people around me and I realize it could be a lot worse.
/ego off
/ego off
Thursday, February 3, 2005
White woman's burden.
biding her time
Why is it that divorced white women are suddenly interested in dating black men? I can't count how many times I've been approached by them over the years. At first I thought it was just some sort of coincidence, but it's happened to me so many times, it made me think.
What drives the seemingly happy WASP Betty home maker to be drawn to the "darkness" after she ditches her mild mannered white hubby? Do they want to explore some bullshit Mandingo fantasy? Or maybe they've been attracted to black men all along. If that's true, why not marry a black guy in the first place?
This has always intrigued me since high school. One girl in particular dated exclusively black guys, but not me since I was the big ol' fat kid. Anyway, her parents never knew about it, being the conservative southern traditionalist they were. In other words, they were racist. It was funny how she concealed this fact from them by getting one of her white friends to pick her up for dances and taking their photos together to appease the white parents and then she got together with her real boyfriend and takes a seperate set of photos with him. This happened all throughout high school. I thought it was pretty fucked up myself. Don't think I could be anyone's "dark little secret". Well maybe I could if I was just using her for sex...ahem.
ANYWAY, everyone thought for sure that these two were going to get married or she was definitely going to marry a black man, but lo and beyond she stuns everyone by marrying some average white dude and having a couple of kids.
They later divorced and now she's dating black men again.
Not the first time I've seen shit like this happen either. I remember this one girl I knew in college who said she's going to marry a white guy to satisfy her parents and when they're dead, she's going to dump the white dude and start going out with the "bruthas" again. God, I wanted to kick her fucking teeth in. Like we're good enough to date, but GOD FORBID that we might actually be good enough to MARRY! Perish the thought!
I talked to another friend of mine who was married and divorced a white guy even though she dated primarily black men throughout college and she revealed a disturbing truth that I've always suspected. She said part of the reason she married the white guy was to satisfy her conservative parents. She said being raised in a bible belt household there was tremendous pressure to marry within your own race and squirt out a couple white grandkids.
I think the whole thing is sad. Grown women still feeling so pressured to live by their PARENT'S ideals that they sacrifice their individuality in order to please them.
This whole thing makes me wonder just how many happily married white women are going through the same thing?
I guess I'm fortunate to be raised by parents whose philosophy was this: "We don't care what color the girl is, just make sure you don't knock her up! We're not raising any more damn kids!" Ah, I can feel the love.
Now I've crossed the color barrier a few times in my day despite the great risk to my personal safety, but I don't care! I'll take ANY risk in the name of love!! Well.... that and certain... sexual favors. Anyhoo, when it comes to dating white girls, I've met all types: The "curious" ones wondering about the stereotype about our genitalia, the "status seekers" who seem to think that bagging a black guy is a huge accomplishment. Nothing I love more than finding out that a girl is referring to me as "her black boyfriend." The ones who grew up in suburbia yet feel compelled to speak ebonics to me... I don't know what the fuck they're saying!
And of course there are the ones who look at me as a regular guy. Yes, they do exist!
Unfortunately, you have to go through a LOT of chicks like the ones mentioned before to find them and I'm too lazy to exert that kind of effort.
Okay, I forgot what my ultimate point was, but I've made several. Fuck it, I'm tired. I'm going home.
Tuesday, February 1, 2005
Another reason why I'm awesome.
Yet another reason for my awesomeness is my ability to drag a minimal amount of baggage with me when I go into a new relationship. I figure why let my dealings with a few insensitive, uncaring, manipulative skank bags taint my current love/lust interest? This girl hasn't done anything to deserve that kind of shit from me.
Hell, considering all the times I've been burned before, I should be the most bitter, vindictive, mistrusting mother fucker on the planet! But I'm not. Now I admit I have my moments of weakness, but compared to a vast majority of people and the crap I've gone through, I think I do all right. Of course I didn't always have this maturity and it took me awhile to get where I'm at today, but it was worth it. Some people would call it a weakness or being naive. I call "those people" DUMB FUCKS.
If the alternative is going through life thinking every chick is going to cheat on me, steal my money or threaten my life just because of the actions of one or two crazy broads, I'd rather be weak and naive.
Besides, you could miss out on some really cool things the new chick can offer you if you go in with an attitude like that. She might even be THE ONE™.
Not ALL my relationships were shitty though. Far from it. There have been a lot more great relationships than bad ones. The bad ones are just a lot more fun to bitch about! No, the exes who were worth a damn are still very close friends of mine. The ones I don't give a shit about, I have nothing to do with.. A simple philosophy that preserves sanity and prevents unecessary bloodshed and jail time. NO chick is worth THAT.
Besides, Karma has a way of dispensing justice.
Example: the chick who left me for some construction worker is unmarried, knocked up with her third kid (father unknown), works at a truck stop and lives with her parents.
This is where I would normally laugh my balls off and do my famous Black Irish robot dance of joy, but I've already been karma's bitch a couple of times and I have no desire to go there again.
heh.
Hell, considering all the times I've been burned before, I should be the most bitter, vindictive, mistrusting mother fucker on the planet! But I'm not. Now I admit I have my moments of weakness, but compared to a vast majority of people and the crap I've gone through, I think I do all right. Of course I didn't always have this maturity and it took me awhile to get where I'm at today, but it was worth it. Some people would call it a weakness or being naive. I call "those people" DUMB FUCKS.
If the alternative is going through life thinking every chick is going to cheat on me, steal my money or threaten my life just because of the actions of one or two crazy broads, I'd rather be weak and naive.
Besides, you could miss out on some really cool things the new chick can offer you if you go in with an attitude like that. She might even be THE ONE™.
Not ALL my relationships were shitty though. Far from it. There have been a lot more great relationships than bad ones. The bad ones are just a lot more fun to bitch about! No, the exes who were worth a damn are still very close friends of mine. The ones I don't give a shit about, I have nothing to do with.. A simple philosophy that preserves sanity and prevents unecessary bloodshed and jail time. NO chick is worth THAT.
Besides, Karma has a way of dispensing justice.
Example: the chick who left me for some construction worker is unmarried, knocked up with her third kid (father unknown), works at a truck stop and lives with her parents.
This is where I would normally laugh my balls off and do my famous Black Irish robot dance of joy, but I've already been karma's bitch a couple of times and I have no desire to go there again.
heh.
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