Do you have that one person in your life that you constantly defend from other people's accusations that he/she may not be the sharpest tool in the shed? Do find yourself making excuses for their behavior by calling them absent minded, scatter brained or confused? At the same time however, you deny the fact that just talking to this person seems to be draining your own intelligence. You continue on with the denial because after all, they're YOUR friend...you would never associate with a person like that.
Then one day, this person does or says something so incredibly stupid, so earth shattering retarded, so mind blowingly moronic, you have no choice but to face the brutal realization: This person is a DUMB ASS.
Suddenly it's your mission in life to put as much distance between you and this dolt as possible.
I came to this realization recently.
Wednesday, December 29, 2004
78,000 dead
That's the official death toll from the Tsunami disaster. That's more than the American dead in Vietnam only this happened in a matter of minutes. They expect that number to climb to 100,000. Crazy.
It's nice to see the world pulling together to help these nations out including the good 'ol USA, but I can't help but remember how these same nations, including the good ol' US of A didn't lift a finger to prevent the 600,000 people who were butchered in Rowanda a few years ago. I guess since they were killed by other people and not some giant wave of water, it doesn't constitute a "disaster".
Oh well... I guess it's not that important.
It's nice to see the world pulling together to help these nations out including the good 'ol USA, but I can't help but remember how these same nations, including the good ol' US of A didn't lift a finger to prevent the 600,000 people who were butchered in Rowanda a few years ago. I guess since they were killed by other people and not some giant wave of water, it doesn't constitute a "disaster".
Oh well... I guess it's not that important.
Friday, December 24, 2004
Tuesday, December 21, 2004
More Hardee's hate
my heart hurts
You know, Hardees is reeeally starting to bug the hell outta me. I think I bitched about them before, but I'll do it again!
Anyhoo, I've always been annoyed by their fucking THICK BURGER ads. I mean I guess they're targeting the MANLY MAN demographic or something because they always show these blue collar, average everyday joes talkin' about how much they hate Mcdonalds and how the just crave a good ol' hardees thickburger.
One commercial that stands out advertises their god awful abomination Monster Burger. It shows a bunch of Old Navy looking pretty boys wearing backward caps and driving a Monster Truck (get it) while scarfing down some good ol' Hardees MONSTER BURGERS! Is this supposed to epitomize men or something?? Gee, I've never gotten the urge to drive a big ass truck in the middle of the desert and eat fast food. Am I crazy or just retarded?
But wait! What do men think with besides their stomachs? That right, their DICKS! That's why Hardees decides to throw in some bimbo pretending to eat one of their nasty burgers and looking like she's having an orgasm while doing it. Holy underwear, what the fuck?!! Yeah, I'm sure some pencil thin twig girl eats 1500 calorie burgers everyday! Come on! Oooh, baby! That's my wet dream right there! Oh how I would love to shove my tounge down her throat to taste the greasy goodness of her big ass THICK BURGER! fap fap fap *splat*
Full circle
Just came back from the bathroom. On my way back I walked past a white woman and said "hello". It looked like she was about faint from fright. Funny thing is, It was the same white woman I scared a year ago and was the subject of my very first post http://voodazz.blogspot.com/2003_12_01_voodazz_archive.html
I wonder if she recognized me or just saw me as some scary negro hell bent on raping her and stealing her purse. How funny.
I wonder if she recognized me or just saw me as some scary negro hell bent on raping her and stealing her purse. How funny.
Monday, December 20, 2004
Would you do it?
Some 3rd grader shmuck asked me if I would pose naked for Playgirl for 3 million dollars. The "catch" is I would be photographed from all angles and the it would be publicized so everyone would know! GASP! DUN DUN DUUUUN!!
How in the blue man group HELL is this remotely a difficult decision????
This is a great example of the contrast between men and women. Women have this stupid ass thing they call "self respect" or whatever that would usually stop them from doing this. A stupid, irrational decision will keep a lot of them with an average or below average bank account....while just about every guy would jump on this in a hot minute, and have much more money than the average person will see in a lifetime.
Really, I'm thinking about what's the lowest amount I would pose for...? that's the real question. Hell, they could give me about 30-35,000 and I'd do it. For 3 million, I will have already stripped all my clothes off and oiled myself up before the person can even finish asking the question. I have no problem exposing my tra la la to a worldwide audience for that kind of loot!
Sheesh... it's not like it's gay porn or anything… that would cost significantly more.
Stupid 3rd graders. I hope I wasn't that freakin' lame at that age.
How in the blue man group HELL is this remotely a difficult decision????
This is a great example of the contrast between men and women. Women have this stupid ass thing they call "self respect" or whatever that would usually stop them from doing this. A stupid, irrational decision will keep a lot of them with an average or below average bank account....while just about every guy would jump on this in a hot minute, and have much more money than the average person will see in a lifetime.
Really, I'm thinking about what's the lowest amount I would pose for...? that's the real question. Hell, they could give me about 30-35,000 and I'd do it. For 3 million, I will have already stripped all my clothes off and oiled myself up before the person can even finish asking the question. I have no problem exposing my tra la la to a worldwide audience for that kind of loot!
Sheesh... it's not like it's gay porn or anything… that would cost significantly more.
Stupid 3rd graders. I hope I wasn't that freakin' lame at that age.
Sunday, December 19, 2004
SoHo's
I went over to Chaunda's to pick her up to go to a club called Sohos. When I got there, she said she was feeling kinda 'blah' so i stayed over to mooch off her cable--I mean, to TALK with her.
Well after watching a wonderful episode of CHEATERS and some crappy b-movie with killer puppets, we went over to the club.
It was a pretty nice place with a cool mix of people. I was kind of annoyed when I wasn't padded down at the door. What? I don't look intimidating enough?? I had on a leather jacket and a skull cap dammit!! Then I realized it was probably because I was SO DAMN OLD! Bouncer called me "sir". I'm suprised he didn't help get up the step. Young punk!
We just sat and talked while people watching and there were some nice looking ladies walking around, but I concentrated mainly on the 42 inch flat screen HDTV hanging on the wall...drool....some day...some day...
I talked to Chaunda about her concerns with her new man and offered any advice I could. It's the least I could do after she helped me get out of my rencent funk, she checked the place out a couple of times and eventually we left.
Not a bad way to spend the rest of Saturday night.
Well after watching a wonderful episode of CHEATERS and some crappy b-movie with killer puppets, we went over to the club.
It was a pretty nice place with a cool mix of people. I was kind of annoyed when I wasn't padded down at the door. What? I don't look intimidating enough?? I had on a leather jacket and a skull cap dammit!! Then I realized it was probably because I was SO DAMN OLD! Bouncer called me "sir". I'm suprised he didn't help get up the step. Young punk!
We just sat and talked while people watching and there were some nice looking ladies walking around, but I concentrated mainly on the 42 inch flat screen HDTV hanging on the wall...drool....some day...some day...
I talked to Chaunda about her concerns with her new man and offered any advice I could. It's the least I could do after she helped me get out of my rencent funk, she checked the place out a couple of times and eventually we left.
Not a bad way to spend the rest of Saturday night.
Ron's return
I was at the mall Saturday trying to find a certain Happy Bunny shirt to give to a friend of mine for xmas, when Ron walks up to me and asks me if these pants would look good on him. I told him that they might be a little too big for him and I didn't like the color. He told me I was probably right and continued to look around.
Did i mention that I hadn't seen Ron in almost two years? That's the kind of friendship we have. He just pops in after disappearing for a few months and it's just like he never left. No obnoxious HELLOS or questions about what we've been up to or any crap like that.
Anyway, after introducing me to his latest sugar daddy (forgot his name) we started walking around the mall making crude observations about people and "young love". Ron muses how shocked the girlfriend will be when she finds out that her boyfriend in a closet case and leaves her for a young philipino stud named "Javier".
For the rest of the night, Ron tried to get me to come out of the closet myself...he's been trying for 10 years with no luck so far. I'm afraid I'm a willing slave to the ALMIGHTY VAGINA™ I'm amused by his efforts though.
The sugar daddy was a pretty cool guy as well. Unlike Ron, he didn't scream out "I'M GAY!!" He just looked like your average mid-thirties professional and he thought it was pretty funny when I said Ron was "special" and called him "Corky". I kept asking him to wear his mittens and football helmet. He wasn't amused.
Later on we ate at Ruby Tuesday (i had forgotten how crappy their food was). I was complaining that the average server looked like she was 16 years old! I inquired about one of them, and sure enough she was in FUCKING HIGH SCHOOL!!
Yeah, they never let me hear the end of that one... SIGH.
As we were eating our crappy overpriced food, a big chested woman walks by and Ron says "Did you see the size of those sweater hawgs??!" I nearly choked on my crappy overpriced burger... hehe... "sweater hawgs..." I'm stealing that.
After dinner, we wandered around some more and went to the arcade to watch Ron pay some pinball (fun).
Eventually we decided to leave and sugar-daddy dropped me off to my car and I have to say, his car was fucking SWEEET! Ron hit the jackpot with this one!
Anyway, after a hug and an ass grab, Ron disappears once again. He says we'll do something later on, but I know that'll probably be next year. Ah, well.
Did i mention that I hadn't seen Ron in almost two years? That's the kind of friendship we have. He just pops in after disappearing for a few months and it's just like he never left. No obnoxious HELLOS or questions about what we've been up to or any crap like that.
Anyway, after introducing me to his latest sugar daddy (forgot his name) we started walking around the mall making crude observations about people and "young love". Ron muses how shocked the girlfriend will be when she finds out that her boyfriend in a closet case and leaves her for a young philipino stud named "Javier".
For the rest of the night, Ron tried to get me to come out of the closet myself...he's been trying for 10 years with no luck so far. I'm afraid I'm a willing slave to the ALMIGHTY VAGINA™ I'm amused by his efforts though.
The sugar daddy was a pretty cool guy as well. Unlike Ron, he didn't scream out "I'M GAY!!" He just looked like your average mid-thirties professional and he thought it was pretty funny when I said Ron was "special" and called him "Corky". I kept asking him to wear his mittens and football helmet. He wasn't amused.
Later on we ate at Ruby Tuesday (i had forgotten how crappy their food was). I was complaining that the average server looked like she was 16 years old! I inquired about one of them, and sure enough she was in FUCKING HIGH SCHOOL!!
Yeah, they never let me hear the end of that one... SIGH.
As we were eating our crappy overpriced food, a big chested woman walks by and Ron says "Did you see the size of those sweater hawgs??!" I nearly choked on my crappy overpriced burger... hehe... "sweater hawgs..." I'm stealing that.
After dinner, we wandered around some more and went to the arcade to watch Ron pay some pinball (fun).
Eventually we decided to leave and sugar-daddy dropped me off to my car and I have to say, his car was fucking SWEEET! Ron hit the jackpot with this one!
Anyway, after a hug and an ass grab, Ron disappears once again. He says we'll do something later on, but I know that'll probably be next year. Ah, well.
Saturday, December 18, 2004
Dmgxmas party
I'm sitting in my office. It's a little after 6am. I have a slight headache. Still trying to remember the events of last night's christmas party...
Well, it started out pretty calmly enough. Just a few people here and there, very cool, PLUS a surprise visit from my friend Claire!! Surprised the shit outta me! It was like old times with us yacking away as usual and such.
For some reason I gave her access to my name and password (by then i was a little giddy from the rum and cokes) and I find out MUCH later she'd been having a little fun with my comment thingees.
Normally, I'd stomp a mudhole in her and walk it dry, but she's practically family and she did help me through a rough patch in my life, so I spared her life. For now.
Suddenly my friend Tinah SLAMS into my glass door, spilling her drink all over it! Holy shit! Typical Tinah entrance! I've always had a thing for this woman, I just find her so freakin' sexy.
Anyway we all yap for awhile before she takes my picture and leaves. Typical Tinah exit.
Eventually Claire had to leave to see her folks and i was left to fight the now enormous crowd gathered around the bar. Oh yeah, I had a religious experience with Wasabi. My GOD that stuff just burns through your sinuses and right into your brain! I think I saw God.
I met a fascinating older woman who was a professor of education at UT. Now I consider myself a pretty smart cookie, but you could just FEEL the intellect eminating from her. It was quite a turn on. Anyway, we start talking about houses and I told her my interest in buying one and she told me of a kick ass realtor. We went to my office and she showed me the site and I have to say, I was quite impressed! She said he is extremely flexible and has over 100 properties all over town.
I saw the houses that were available and they were pretty damn sweet! She gave me his card and told me to say that she sent me. Hell, this was WAY better than her phone number!
Oh yeah, I made a play on her and she was actually flattered since she said it's been awhile since anyone has ever flirted with her. I found that hard to believe. She was hot! But anyway, she gave me the "I'm too old for you" line. Whatever…she's only six years older than me. Oh well... she was still very cool!
As the night went on, I started speaking in tounges. A clear sign that I have had enough to drink.
Around that time my good friends Lauren and Jessee came in. It was soooo good to see them again, although it had been months since I'd seen them last, it was like we never parted. Very cool.
My other friend Jude and Lauren's friend, whats-her-face came into my office and we had fun comparing horror stories about our recent break ups. It was almost scary at all the similarities our stories had. We actually finished each others' sentences! How funny!
After that, I had to leave to meet Shannon over at the downtown grill. It was pretty cool. I was kinda anxious because she was with her "bitch pack", but they were nice and I didn't feel like I was being critiqued. Well, I'm sure I was, but they hid it well.
After I got done with that I headed back to the party which was still going strong. I met a few VERY drunk college friends and we talked about my infamous "Axel Rose" impression as well as the Rob Zombie "incident". Man, I forgot all about that!
Anyway, it was getting pretty late and I didn't trust myself to drive so i decided to crash on the couch in my office... which brings us here.
Man, I'm so hungry.
Well, it started out pretty calmly enough. Just a few people here and there, very cool, PLUS a surprise visit from my friend Claire!! Surprised the shit outta me! It was like old times with us yacking away as usual and such.
For some reason I gave her access to my name and password (by then i was a little giddy from the rum and cokes) and I find out MUCH later she'd been having a little fun with my comment thingees.
Normally, I'd stomp a mudhole in her and walk it dry, but she's practically family and she did help me through a rough patch in my life, so I spared her life. For now.
Suddenly my friend Tinah SLAMS into my glass door, spilling her drink all over it! Holy shit! Typical Tinah entrance! I've always had a thing for this woman, I just find her so freakin' sexy.
Anyway we all yap for awhile before she takes my picture and leaves. Typical Tinah exit.
Eventually Claire had to leave to see her folks and i was left to fight the now enormous crowd gathered around the bar. Oh yeah, I had a religious experience with Wasabi. My GOD that stuff just burns through your sinuses and right into your brain! I think I saw God.
I met a fascinating older woman who was a professor of education at UT. Now I consider myself a pretty smart cookie, but you could just FEEL the intellect eminating from her. It was quite a turn on. Anyway, we start talking about houses and I told her my interest in buying one and she told me of a kick ass realtor. We went to my office and she showed me the site and I have to say, I was quite impressed! She said he is extremely flexible and has over 100 properties all over town.
I saw the houses that were available and they were pretty damn sweet! She gave me his card and told me to say that she sent me. Hell, this was WAY better than her phone number!
Oh yeah, I made a play on her and she was actually flattered since she said it's been awhile since anyone has ever flirted with her. I found that hard to believe. She was hot! But anyway, she gave me the "I'm too old for you" line. Whatever…she's only six years older than me. Oh well... she was still very cool!
As the night went on, I started speaking in tounges. A clear sign that I have had enough to drink.
Around that time my good friends Lauren and Jessee came in. It was soooo good to see them again, although it had been months since I'd seen them last, it was like we never parted. Very cool.
My other friend Jude and Lauren's friend, whats-her-face came into my office and we had fun comparing horror stories about our recent break ups. It was almost scary at all the similarities our stories had. We actually finished each others' sentences! How funny!
After that, I had to leave to meet Shannon over at the downtown grill. It was pretty cool. I was kinda anxious because she was with her "bitch pack", but they were nice and I didn't feel like I was being critiqued. Well, I'm sure I was, but they hid it well.
After I got done with that I headed back to the party which was still going strong. I met a few VERY drunk college friends and we talked about my infamous "Axel Rose" impression as well as the Rob Zombie "incident". Man, I forgot all about that!
Anyway, it was getting pretty late and I didn't trust myself to drive so i decided to crash on the couch in my office... which brings us here.
Man, I'm so hungry.
Friday, December 17, 2004
Great News!
Well I think it's great news. My sister and hubby have bought their FIRST HOUSE!!! And it's not a piece of crap either! It's pretty damn nice!! I'm so proud of her!
Feeling good
It feels like 50 tons have been lifted off of my shoulders. It feels great! Just thought I'd share. Fuck you if you don't care. (that rhymes!) I'm a freakin' freestyle genius!! FEEL my awesomeness and TREMBLE!
The Ladies
Okay, a week ago I'm at a pub, listening to a really cool band (forgot the name) when these two older women asked if they could sit with me. I didn't care and let them have a seat.
I could immediately tell that these women were drunk as hell and enjoying every minute of it. Viv and Sue were their names. They were about in their early or mid 50s and they were from North Hampton. Unlike your typical night club skank, these ladies had some class. They carried themselves very well and judging by their demeanor, and jewelery, they screamed "old money".
They asked me if I would like a drink and i said no thanks. Well it's Viv's birthday and they've been all over town doing chick things like maincures, shopping for crap, drinking and etc.
After awhile, I was starting to like these women. They were pretty damn cool and I decided to accept that drink offer.
Well... 6 shots of B-52s and one bottle of Smirnoff later, I was pretty damned buzzed and enjoying myself!
Sue said she was getting hot and decides to take off her sweater. The first thing that went through my mind was "wow…she has some pretty firm breasts for a 50 year old...oh... wait..." Maybe it was the booze, but she didn't look half bad for a 50+ year old... shit...if she were 20 years younger, I'd give her a shot!
She said something that stuck with me. She said life is short and you can't waste time complaining how shitty it is. Yeah, it might not sound like much, but at the time, I was feeling a bit low and that actually cheered me up.
Well, it was getting late and they said they were going to their hotel room where their other friends were waiting (i declined the offer to join them). I offered to pay my share of the drinks but Sue waved me off as she opened up her purse and I saw at least 800 dollars in cash! Old money indeed.
We hugged each other good bye and went our separate ways. I think that's the closest I've come to having a sugar mamma.
I could immediately tell that these women were drunk as hell and enjoying every minute of it. Viv and Sue were their names. They were about in their early or mid 50s and they were from North Hampton. Unlike your typical night club skank, these ladies had some class. They carried themselves very well and judging by their demeanor, and jewelery, they screamed "old money".
They asked me if I would like a drink and i said no thanks. Well it's Viv's birthday and they've been all over town doing chick things like maincures, shopping for crap, drinking and etc.
After awhile, I was starting to like these women. They were pretty damn cool and I decided to accept that drink offer.
Well... 6 shots of B-52s and one bottle of Smirnoff later, I was pretty damned buzzed and enjoying myself!
Sue said she was getting hot and decides to take off her sweater. The first thing that went through my mind was "wow…she has some pretty firm breasts for a 50 year old...oh... wait..." Maybe it was the booze, but she didn't look half bad for a 50+ year old... shit...if she were 20 years younger, I'd give her a shot!
She said something that stuck with me. She said life is short and you can't waste time complaining how shitty it is. Yeah, it might not sound like much, but at the time, I was feeling a bit low and that actually cheered me up.
Well, it was getting late and they said they were going to their hotel room where their other friends were waiting (i declined the offer to join them). I offered to pay my share of the drinks but Sue waved me off as she opened up her purse and I saw at least 800 dollars in cash! Old money indeed.
We hugged each other good bye and went our separate ways. I think that's the closest I've come to having a sugar mamma.
Thursday, December 16, 2004
Tiny Tim
A few days ago I was hanging out with Scott, aka "Tiny Tim" who was injured in Iraq awhile back and enjoying ourselves as usual, but I noticed something different about him this time.
I no longer saw the gung-ho ready to die for his country ass kickin' marine I saw a few weeks earlier. In his place, was a rather bitter, cynical and critical young man. What I had feared was true… he HAD seen a lot of things most of us could never imagine. He told me stories about seeing dead women and children and mangled bodies strewn all over the street.
He also told me that he's seen several of his friends killed or severely wounded.. In fact, during the ambush that injured him, his friend got his leg blown off as well as losing an eye.
He also expressed frustration on the way the war is fought, telling me about having to radio in for permission to return fire even when the enemy is shooting at them. Letting terrorists get away because of bullshit rules of engagement, not having enough equipment at times, doing bullshit photo ops for the media (he was on TV!) the list goes on. I reminded him that he wasn't allowed to talk about these things and he just said, "I'm going back to Iraq. What else can they do to me?"
Unlike a lot of the soldiers stationed in Iraq, he was right in the middle of some of the bloodiest fighting in the war and I fear he hasn't emerged unscathed...I mean how could he NOT be after all that.
They have mandatory psyche evaluations for returning soldiers, but I think they aren't doing a very good job at it. I'm worried about the long term mental affects this will have on my friend.
Sigh... so much for relying of good 'ol Tiny Tim to lift my spirits during my own emotional funk.
I no longer saw the gung-ho ready to die for his country ass kickin' marine I saw a few weeks earlier. In his place, was a rather bitter, cynical and critical young man. What I had feared was true… he HAD seen a lot of things most of us could never imagine. He told me stories about seeing dead women and children and mangled bodies strewn all over the street.
He also told me that he's seen several of his friends killed or severely wounded.. In fact, during the ambush that injured him, his friend got his leg blown off as well as losing an eye.
He also expressed frustration on the way the war is fought, telling me about having to radio in for permission to return fire even when the enemy is shooting at them. Letting terrorists get away because of bullshit rules of engagement, not having enough equipment at times, doing bullshit photo ops for the media (he was on TV!) the list goes on. I reminded him that he wasn't allowed to talk about these things and he just said, "I'm going back to Iraq. What else can they do to me?"
Unlike a lot of the soldiers stationed in Iraq, he was right in the middle of some of the bloodiest fighting in the war and I fear he hasn't emerged unscathed...I mean how could he NOT be after all that.
They have mandatory psyche evaluations for returning soldiers, but I think they aren't doing a very good job at it. I'm worried about the long term mental affects this will have on my friend.
Sigh... so much for relying of good 'ol Tiny Tim to lift my spirits during my own emotional funk.
Clarity
I was hanging out with Chaunda over at the Preservation Pub, actually i was walking her to her car from the preservation pub and we were discussing my certain tendancies and she said the most profound thing anyone has ever said to me…she compared me with a rat. A dirty stinkin', smelly, fucking disease ridden rat!
Anyway she went on to say that I was like a rat in those food pellet experiments: The rat was conditioned to push this lever which gave it food. When there a consistant flow of food the rat had a complacecent attitude towards the food since it knew it would always be there. When the lever didn't produce any food, the rat would get bored and move on. However, when the lever gave food at random intervals, the rat became obessed with the lever, furiously scratching at it, hoping that it will get lucky and get a snack. It couldn't walk away because it just couldn't risk missing that little bit of dried out, crunchy stale goodness.
And there it was……my moment of utter clarity. She put it all in perspective. That's EXACTLY what I become when I find myself in situations concerning mixed signals. When the answer is a definite "YES", I'm cool. When it's a definite "NO", I move on. When it's both a "YES" and "NO" or "KINDA" answer, I become that desperate clawing little rat jonsin' for that little piece of nuggety goodness.
And there you have it. Sheeesh!! I think that finally pulled me out of the funk I was in for awhile! How weird!
I never thought I'd be happy being called a fucking rat…
Anyway she went on to say that I was like a rat in those food pellet experiments: The rat was conditioned to push this lever which gave it food. When there a consistant flow of food the rat had a complacecent attitude towards the food since it knew it would always be there. When the lever didn't produce any food, the rat would get bored and move on. However, when the lever gave food at random intervals, the rat became obessed with the lever, furiously scratching at it, hoping that it will get lucky and get a snack. It couldn't walk away because it just couldn't risk missing that little bit of dried out, crunchy stale goodness.
And there it was……my moment of utter clarity. She put it all in perspective. That's EXACTLY what I become when I find myself in situations concerning mixed signals. When the answer is a definite "YES", I'm cool. When it's a definite "NO", I move on. When it's both a "YES" and "NO" or "KINDA" answer, I become that desperate clawing little rat jonsin' for that little piece of nuggety goodness.
And there you have it. Sheeesh!! I think that finally pulled me out of the funk I was in for awhile! How weird!
I never thought I'd be happy being called a fucking rat…
Contemplating Suicide.
It's over. I can't go on. The pain is too great. I'm ending it now. Life is just an unbearable pile of garbage and I sick of it's putrid smell. Every fucking moment I breathe is agony. FUCK YOU , world! You won't have me to kick around anymore!
Boo fuckin' Hoo! Holy shit! Apparently a couple of you readers actually thought I was considering killing myself! Wrong!! Despite how low I was feeling during my "down time" I never ONCE considered doing a Corbain. I'm far too awesome to do such a thing! Suicide is for pussy angsty teens and dumbasses who can't handle the pain that is LIFE.
Actually... what I was planning on doing was in a way, far, far worse... At least with suicide, you're at peace and your pain is over. This particular plan of action would've resulted in a never ending cycle of pain, shame and torment that would only intensify with each passing day, thus resulting in a shattered, gibbering, drooling, frail husk of what barely passes as human standing where a rather incredibly awesome man used to be.
Thank God that my friends were able to pull back from the brink of chaos!
Nice to know that I always have back up whenever I'm not feeling as awesome as usual. Now that my head is clear, I now know what I have to do and I've already taken the first steps.
Boo fuckin' Hoo! Holy shit! Apparently a couple of you readers actually thought I was considering killing myself! Wrong!! Despite how low I was feeling during my "down time" I never ONCE considered doing a Corbain. I'm far too awesome to do such a thing! Suicide is for pussy angsty teens and dumbasses who can't handle the pain that is LIFE.
Actually... what I was planning on doing was in a way, far, far worse... At least with suicide, you're at peace and your pain is over. This particular plan of action would've resulted in a never ending cycle of pain, shame and torment that would only intensify with each passing day, thus resulting in a shattered, gibbering, drooling, frail husk of what barely passes as human standing where a rather incredibly awesome man used to be.
Thank God that my friends were able to pull back from the brink of chaos!
Nice to know that I always have back up whenever I'm not feeling as awesome as usual. Now that my head is clear, I now know what I have to do and I've already taken the first steps.
Saturday, December 11, 2004
I hate this
Ever been hit with an overwhelming feeling of despair and regret? That's how I'm feeling right now and I HATE it. Although I've been pretty happy lately, I always had a feeling that this would happen, but not so suddenly and not all at once. I thought I was better prepared to handle it, but I was wrong.
Nothing else to do but face this head on and get it over with no matter what the cost.
I'll get through this. I always do.
Nothing else to do but face this head on and get it over with no matter what the cost.
I'll get through this. I always do.
Friday, December 10, 2004
Drunk chick
I was walking towards my car, looking for my friend when I noticed a very drunk girl yelling at random people. Well, for some reason I asked her if she was okay and she clumbsily started coming on to me, babbling about something about sticking up for "her boy" who was being hassled by a bunch of "punks". I asked if "her man" was parking the car or something and she nodded and then she just STARED at me. I said "what?" and she said she loved me eyes and started stroking my face.
Okay, this girl was pretty cute and all, but she was a fucking shit faced, drooling, obnoxious, inchoherent mess...you know...typical sorostitute.
Oh yeah... she had a boyfriend too.
I swear this broad was about to fall on me she was that unstable. I just kinda...propped her against a fence and went on to find my friend and got the hell outta Dodge before the roads become clogged with more of her kind.
Everyone is stupid except me.
Okay, this girl was pretty cute and all, but she was a fucking shit faced, drooling, obnoxious, inchoherent mess...you know...typical sorostitute.
Oh yeah... she had a boyfriend too.
I swear this broad was about to fall on me she was that unstable. I just kinda...propped her against a fence and went on to find my friend and got the hell outta Dodge before the roads become clogged with more of her kind.
Everyone is stupid except me.
Another blast from the past.
I was enjoying some cool live music at a trendy little dowtown pub Thursday night when I get a tap on the shoulder. I turn around and some chick is staring at me and say's "Vincent? Is that you?" I was taken a little off guard. I had no idea who this girl was and she knew my name? Then again, I AM quite legendary, but still, it was a little uneasy for me.
She told me that her name was Shannon and we used to live in the same neighborhood together. I took my eyes off her cleavage long enough to remember that she used to hang around my brother and me when we used to shoot guns back in the day. She was always such an annoying girl and an infamous druggie to boot, so needless to say, I didn't waste my brain cells remembering this nobody.
Anyway, when she got done with the whole bullshit chit chat talk of "how are you?" "what have you been up to?" "How's your brother?", blah, blah, blah... the only question I could think for her was: "So…you're still alive, huh?"
She was a little taken aback by the question and nervously laughed and I continued by saying: "Well you know, with all the drugs you were on, I thought for sure you'd be dead before 21". She laughed like I was joking (I was dead serious) and she went on to tell me a fascinatingly boring story about how she's been clean for x number of years and how she's bettered herself through God and all that crap I've heard a thousand times before.
Hey, I'm glad she managed to pull herself together, good for her. I know how hard it is to kick the habit (not by personal experience, thank you very much) but I don't know her, I don't like her, I never cared about her and I'm not about to start pretending now. No, only my FRIENDS and FAMILY get that privilage. Plus in my experience with "born agains" is that they are the biggest judgemental hypocrites on the planet. They think just because they've found Jesus, it's their god given RIGHT to judge and condem anyone to HELL if they do something as atrocious as spitting on the ground, but their own dubious actions are okay since they're on a first name basis with the almighty.
Of course I acted politely and nice-nice, no need to kill the good mood was in, but I cut it short when she started asking me questions about my personal life that were frankly none of her fucking business. She got the message.
Later on, a friend of mine met up with me and we had a pretty good time touring the dowtown scene.
She told me that her name was Shannon and we used to live in the same neighborhood together. I took my eyes off her cleavage long enough to remember that she used to hang around my brother and me when we used to shoot guns back in the day. She was always such an annoying girl and an infamous druggie to boot, so needless to say, I didn't waste my brain cells remembering this nobody.
Anyway, when she got done with the whole bullshit chit chat talk of "how are you?" "what have you been up to?" "How's your brother?", blah, blah, blah... the only question I could think for her was: "So…you're still alive, huh?"
She was a little taken aback by the question and nervously laughed and I continued by saying: "Well you know, with all the drugs you were on, I thought for sure you'd be dead before 21". She laughed like I was joking (I was dead serious) and she went on to tell me a fascinatingly boring story about how she's been clean for x number of years and how she's bettered herself through God and all that crap I've heard a thousand times before.
Hey, I'm glad she managed to pull herself together, good for her. I know how hard it is to kick the habit (not by personal experience, thank you very much) but I don't know her, I don't like her, I never cared about her and I'm not about to start pretending now. No, only my FRIENDS and FAMILY get that privilage. Plus in my experience with "born agains" is that they are the biggest judgemental hypocrites on the planet. They think just because they've found Jesus, it's their god given RIGHT to judge and condem anyone to HELL if they do something as atrocious as spitting on the ground, but their own dubious actions are okay since they're on a first name basis with the almighty.
Of course I acted politely and nice-nice, no need to kill the good mood was in, but I cut it short when she started asking me questions about my personal life that were frankly none of her fucking business. She got the message.
Later on, a friend of mine met up with me and we had a pretty good time touring the dowtown scene.
Thursday, December 9, 2004
My eyes
I was walking by a mirror and was actually BLINDED by my brilliance.
the doctors say I'll make a full recovery.
the doctors say I'll make a full recovery.
Wednesday, December 8, 2004
Alimony=Vaginamony
I was sitting around, yapping with a friend of mine in a fairly nice hotel room, when the subject about that guy who won 149 million dollars is getting divorced from his worthless money grubbing whore of a wife a month later and OF COURSE, the skankbag is asking for HALF his loot in alimony. Yeah, it's not like the guy worked for his money, but the fact his wife divorced him a MONTH fucking later and demands half his money is fucked up!
This shit really pisses me the hell off! Personally, I think that alimony is outdated and needs to be fucking abolished!
Alimony was created back in the days when women weren't expected (and in some cases not allowed) to work and all they did was raise a family. Nowadays, in the era of "equality", women are more than capable of handling things on their own. To continue to force men to hand over a portion of a paycheck to a woman who is perfectly capable of holding down her own job and taking care of herself just because things didn't work out is utter bullshit.
Yeah, yeah some of you feminist, nazi, pinko douche huggin' skank bags might call this poetic justice since the system was created by the EVIL PENIS DOMINATED EMPIRE, and you're partially right. This shit needs to be changed and it needs to be changed NOW. If you women truly believed in TRUE equality, they would spear head a movement to abolished this incredibly sexist law yourselves since it serves as a blaring reminder of your perceived inferiority. But since that would mean you'd have to give up free cash, I guess it's okay to not be TOO equal. One of the "perks" of being a "lowly" female I suppose.
(Mind you, this has nothing to do with child support, that's a whole other story.)
Bottom line is: Alimony is retarded, women should get NOTHING out of a divorce, NOT A G** DAMN CENT from a man, while child support should go 50/50 if the dad gets the kids 50% of the time, and less if he doesnt, 15% if he can't see them at all...as it's often the case.
Women can fucking work. I've seen many a man who is absolutely destroyed by a divorce...that shit just shouldnt happen. The only thing these greedy life draining bitches should get is THE BOOT OF JUSTICE™ right in the fucking face!
Hell, I'll throw in an example: I saw on a VH1 show one of the most ridiculous celeb divorce cases....Lionel Richie's ex-wife was asking for 300,000 per MONTH....going on in detail about how much she "needs" monthly for not only the kids, but also plastic surgery, personal trainer, hair/makeup, etc. If I were in Lionel's place at that time....seriously...she would suddenly have a nasty "accident" one day....or perhaps just disappear completely like Jimmy Hoffa.
I'm a pissed off man who loves his money! Hear me roar!!
This shit really pisses me the hell off! Personally, I think that alimony is outdated and needs to be fucking abolished!
Alimony was created back in the days when women weren't expected (and in some cases not allowed) to work and all they did was raise a family. Nowadays, in the era of "equality", women are more than capable of handling things on their own. To continue to force men to hand over a portion of a paycheck to a woman who is perfectly capable of holding down her own job and taking care of herself just because things didn't work out is utter bullshit.
Yeah, yeah some of you feminist, nazi, pinko douche huggin' skank bags might call this poetic justice since the system was created by the EVIL PENIS DOMINATED EMPIRE, and you're partially right. This shit needs to be changed and it needs to be changed NOW. If you women truly believed in TRUE equality, they would spear head a movement to abolished this incredibly sexist law yourselves since it serves as a blaring reminder of your perceived inferiority. But since that would mean you'd have to give up free cash, I guess it's okay to not be TOO equal. One of the "perks" of being a "lowly" female I suppose.
(Mind you, this has nothing to do with child support, that's a whole other story.)
Bottom line is: Alimony is retarded, women should get NOTHING out of a divorce, NOT A G** DAMN CENT from a man, while child support should go 50/50 if the dad gets the kids 50% of the time, and less if he doesnt, 15% if he can't see them at all...as it's often the case.
Women can fucking work. I've seen many a man who is absolutely destroyed by a divorce...that shit just shouldnt happen. The only thing these greedy life draining bitches should get is THE BOOT OF JUSTICE™ right in the fucking face!
Hell, I'll throw in an example: I saw on a VH1 show one of the most ridiculous celeb divorce cases....Lionel Richie's ex-wife was asking for 300,000 per MONTH....going on in detail about how much she "needs" monthly for not only the kids, but also plastic surgery, personal trainer, hair/makeup, etc. If I were in Lionel's place at that time....seriously...she would suddenly have a nasty "accident" one day....or perhaps just disappear completely like Jimmy Hoffa.
I'm a pissed off man who loves his money! Hear me roar!!
Tuesday, December 7, 2004
Debauchery and MOM (response)
Okay, I was reading all the comments on my "debauchery" post and I was surprised at all the questions pertaining the ex:
First of all, this has nothing to do with the ex. How the HELL did she even come up anyway?? This is not about getting over her, getting back at her, "moving on" or whatever. So enough of the Dr. Phil wannabe psy 101 crap (I really hate that fat, arrogant, goofy bastard).
I came to an understanding with her a long time ago and things are pretty cool between us now.
We aren't best buddies or anything, but we're talking (sorta). Once again: One day at a time.
As for your "concerns" about her dumping me for the "other guy": She made her decision and followed her heart. That's that…move along, people! Nothing to see here.
I don't think I can make it clearer than that.
Oh, and to all you little trolls trying to start some shit by spewing out random insults, do me a big favor and kindly shut the fuck up.
This was about me wanting to satisfy a basic primal urge and having a great time doing it. This particular girl I was with is one of a few women who can bring out a particularly aggressive part of me that very FEW people ever see which is kind of scary as well as exciting. Of course we've had years to discover each others' "buttons" and we've explored almost every sexual fetish from simple role playing to full on S&M so needless to say, we're VERY comfortable with each other and that also explains the explosive sexual chemistry between us.
I usually don't do the kiss and tell bullshit, but this is a unique story since I've never indulged in so many different fetishes/fantasies and techniques in such rapid succession with little or no rest throughout the night and part of the next day. I kind of surprised myself! It's been years since I let this part of me come out and I guess I was overdue.
Of course my mother calling me in the middle of it all was hilarious and so friggin' surreal! I'm gonna need therapy for that one.
Anyway, I'm done. Hope that answers your questions... like I give a damn if it doesn't.
First of all, this has nothing to do with the ex. How the HELL did she even come up anyway?? This is not about getting over her, getting back at her, "moving on" or whatever. So enough of the Dr. Phil wannabe psy 101 crap (I really hate that fat, arrogant, goofy bastard).
I came to an understanding with her a long time ago and things are pretty cool between us now.
We aren't best buddies or anything, but we're talking (sorta). Once again: One day at a time.
As for your "concerns" about her dumping me for the "other guy": She made her decision and followed her heart. That's that…move along, people! Nothing to see here.
I don't think I can make it clearer than that.
Oh, and to all you little trolls trying to start some shit by spewing out random insults, do me a big favor and kindly shut the fuck up.
This was about me wanting to satisfy a basic primal urge and having a great time doing it. This particular girl I was with is one of a few women who can bring out a particularly aggressive part of me that very FEW people ever see which is kind of scary as well as exciting. Of course we've had years to discover each others' "buttons" and we've explored almost every sexual fetish from simple role playing to full on S&M so needless to say, we're VERY comfortable with each other and that also explains the explosive sexual chemistry between us.
I usually don't do the kiss and tell bullshit, but this is a unique story since I've never indulged in so many different fetishes/fantasies and techniques in such rapid succession with little or no rest throughout the night and part of the next day. I kind of surprised myself! It's been years since I let this part of me come out and I guess I was overdue.
Of course my mother calling me in the middle of it all was hilarious and so friggin' surreal! I'm gonna need therapy for that one.
Anyway, I'm done. Hope that answers your questions... like I give a damn if it doesn't.
Sunday, December 5, 2004
Panther Creek: A new Sunday ritual
click on for larger image
I've decided to dedicate every Sunday afternoon visiting Panther Creek. I don't know what it is about this place, but everytime I go there I just feel so refreshed and renergized! The picture DOES NOT do it justice.
I lost all track of time and had the whole place to myself until a bunch of loud mouth, pizza eating hillbilly women spoiled things. Still... it was pretty nice.
Unbridled debauchery and.....MOM??!
Okay, I was driving around on a boring Friday night, I ran into an old friend that I hadn't seen in years and she invited me over to her place to shoot the shit and watch some movies.
It started out innocently enough with us catching up on old times and watching movies and the next thing I know it ended up a wild, sweaty, debacherous, no holds barred, no mercy asked or given, exhibition of uninhibited sexual FURY that started on her floor, outside on her patio, inside my car WHILE I was driving (a personal fantasy of mine, but I couldn't find a woman to do it with...until now), outside in the middle of a park, more car sex, back to her place to pick up some "supplies", back to my place, outside on MY patio (after watching Family Guy for a whole 5 minutes), on the floor, in the kitchen, against the wall, in the bedroom, on my computer chair and eventually on the bed itself.
I had 3 months of pent up sexual tension to release and it felt fucking GREAT to expel all that energy throughout the night! I had forgotten how aggressive this woman was and how effective her techniques were. It had been years since I was able to go all out like that and not worry about hurting the girl. Hell, I was afraid that she'd hurt me! Oh yeah! I was finally able to "road test" the special condoms on a LIVE subject!
Anyway, this is where it gets weird. It was around 1am, we were still doing our thing when I get a phone call. I picked up the phone by reflex, thinking a call this late could only mean a family emergency or something bad.
Well.... it was my MOTHER. She was okay, but she had called to let me know that my cousins that I haven't' seen in 15 years had just popped in from their trip to Vegas and she was going on and on about all the fun they were having and such.
Meanwhile, I'm behind and STILL inside a beautiful, naked and handcuffed woman who is trying her best not to laugh while I struggled to carry on a conversation with my mom.
I felt so awful... my mom may as well have walked in on us, that's how awkward it was!
Well needless to say, I turned down the invitation and just cracked up with my friend for a whole 10 minutes. I'm STILL not sure that actually happened!
But anyway, the next morning we discussed our situation and agreed it would be a one time thing since she's actually interested in starting something real with a guy she's been talking to, but hasn't done anything with yet and I wasn't interested in any kind of committed relationship, so it worked out perfectly: no confusion, no mixed signals, no drama. Just a pure and simple exercise in depravity. I'm good for another 3 months.
The only trade offs were two destroyed apartments, some bruising, I ran out of "special" condoms and it was hard looking my mother in the eye when I went xmas shopping with her.
It started out innocently enough with us catching up on old times and watching movies and the next thing I know it ended up a wild, sweaty, debacherous, no holds barred, no mercy asked or given, exhibition of uninhibited sexual FURY that started on her floor, outside on her patio, inside my car WHILE I was driving (a personal fantasy of mine, but I couldn't find a woman to do it with...until now), outside in the middle of a park, more car sex, back to her place to pick up some "supplies", back to my place, outside on MY patio (after watching Family Guy for a whole 5 minutes), on the floor, in the kitchen, against the wall, in the bedroom, on my computer chair and eventually on the bed itself.
I had 3 months of pent up sexual tension to release and it felt fucking GREAT to expel all that energy throughout the night! I had forgotten how aggressive this woman was and how effective her techniques were. It had been years since I was able to go all out like that and not worry about hurting the girl. Hell, I was afraid that she'd hurt me! Oh yeah! I was finally able to "road test" the special condoms on a LIVE subject!
Anyway, this is where it gets weird. It was around 1am, we were still doing our thing when I get a phone call. I picked up the phone by reflex, thinking a call this late could only mean a family emergency or something bad.
Well.... it was my MOTHER. She was okay, but she had called to let me know that my cousins that I haven't' seen in 15 years had just popped in from their trip to Vegas and she was going on and on about all the fun they were having and such.
Meanwhile, I'm behind and STILL inside a beautiful, naked and handcuffed woman who is trying her best not to laugh while I struggled to carry on a conversation with my mom.
I felt so awful... my mom may as well have walked in on us, that's how awkward it was!
Well needless to say, I turned down the invitation and just cracked up with my friend for a whole 10 minutes. I'm STILL not sure that actually happened!
But anyway, the next morning we discussed our situation and agreed it would be a one time thing since she's actually interested in starting something real with a guy she's been talking to, but hasn't done anything with yet and I wasn't interested in any kind of committed relationship, so it worked out perfectly: no confusion, no mixed signals, no drama. Just a pure and simple exercise in depravity. I'm good for another 3 months.
The only trade offs were two destroyed apartments, some bruising, I ran out of "special" condoms and it was hard looking my mother in the eye when I went xmas shopping with her.
Friday, December 3, 2004
CLOSET SLUTS
typical closet slut
Loose girls. I love 'em.
There's this whole double standard that women shouldn't be allowed to have a lot of sex. It's as if men are hunters and women are prey, and if women give it up too easily they're seen as weak and disrespected.
But fuck that. I've bitched time and time again about how I hate the bullshit us guys have to go through just to have sex. We don't wanna go through it, there has to be women who are willing to drop the bullshit too and just have sex with us. The "sluts". Seriously, why the fuck do we have to jump through some fucking hoops with chicks who more or less want the same thing: just a meaningless, commit free, no strings attached, fuck session???
In fact, I have more respect for the so-called sluts than I do for the girls who deny their desires in order to avoid the label of "slut". Chicks like this (I call them CLOSET SLUTS) try to force a self-delusional pretense that there's potential for a relationship there, so when it naturally falls apart later she can blame HIM for being a typical "jerk guy", thus saving face with her peers and her reputation remains intact, when all she really wanted in the first place was a good ol' fashioned fuck fest.
So remember this bit of info the next time you meet a girl who starts whining about some "typical jerk guy" fucking her over or she suddenly dumps your sorry ass. Chances are that she's a CLOSET SLUT.
But why go through all that drama? Life would be so much fucking easier if you ladies just gave in to your desires and spared us men the mind numbingly painful ordeals of a fake relationship. Let's just skip the whole wine and dine, getting to know you, hanging out and cuddling bullshit and let's just fuck each others brains out! I certainly wouldn't think any less of you!
SLUTS OF THE WORLD UNITE!!!
and let me know where.
Thursday, December 2, 2004
Enough!
You know, next time asks me for advice, I'm going to keep my yap shut. Why the hell give someone advice WHEN THEY DON'T FRIGGIN' LISTEN TO YOU??!! I'm so tired of this crap! Never fails: person comes boo-hooing about some problem they need help with, I give them a painfully obvious lesson in common sense 101, person doesn't hear a word I say and does the EXACT opposite, person comes back boo-hooing about the same fucking problem!!
For now on, I'm just going to tell them what they want to hear, even if I know it's going to bite them in the ass later on and be done with it. If they give me any lip about getting bitten in the ass, then they're gonna get an ass WHOOPIN' from me. I'm sick of this shit.
For now on, I'm just going to tell them what they want to hear, even if I know it's going to bite them in the ass later on and be done with it. If they give me any lip about getting bitten in the ass, then they're gonna get an ass WHOOPIN' from me. I'm sick of this shit.
Buying forgiveness
So I sitting here, workin' for the MAN when I thought about something that really bugged the hell outta me: guys who try to BUY their way back into a woman's good graces.
What kind of fucked up, noodled spined, insecure piece of donkey shit is THAT??!
Man, when you fuck up with a chick you're supposed to be a fucking MAN and try to work it out with her. You don't try to buy your way out of the dog house by lavishing her with expensive gifts and whatnot. To me you're saying that you're a cowardly little piss ant who doesn't care enough about your woman to actually talk things out with her, instead you opt for the easy way "out" by buying her a buncha crap. This in turn is considered an insult by the woman because now she thinks that you consider her some cheap whore who can be dismissed with a few trinkets. Afterwards, one of two things would happen:
A.) The woman becomes even MORE pissed off and realizes that you think so little of her, eventually leading her to find that much wanted "attention" elsewhere.
B.) The woman loses all respect for you as she realizes how easy it is to manipulate your weak punk ass and decides to bleed you dry, meanwhile she's fucking some hung stud to make her feel alive again as her 10,000 dollar necklace bounces off her 5,000 dollar breasts as the hung stud (whom you hired as her personal trainer, btw) bangs her silly on the hood of the brand new BMW you bought her last week to make up for not walking the fucking dog (also a gift from you)!
Good god! I have no respect for men who do this. Little wimpy bitches who can't talk to their women! It's even worse when these guys don't actually have the money to "appease" the missus and go into debt or some financial debacle when a simple "sorry" would've sufficed. If that's not good enough for the woman, tell her to go fuck herself! She's probably a souless gold digging whore and isn't worth your time OR money anyway!
To all those rich bastards who can actually afford to buy off their women: My penis is bigger than yours so FUCK YOU!!
What kind of fucked up, noodled spined, insecure piece of donkey shit is THAT??!
Man, when you fuck up with a chick you're supposed to be a fucking MAN and try to work it out with her. You don't try to buy your way out of the dog house by lavishing her with expensive gifts and whatnot. To me you're saying that you're a cowardly little piss ant who doesn't care enough about your woman to actually talk things out with her, instead you opt for the easy way "out" by buying her a buncha crap. This in turn is considered an insult by the woman because now she thinks that you consider her some cheap whore who can be dismissed with a few trinkets. Afterwards, one of two things would happen:
A.) The woman becomes even MORE pissed off and realizes that you think so little of her, eventually leading her to find that much wanted "attention" elsewhere.
B.) The woman loses all respect for you as she realizes how easy it is to manipulate your weak punk ass and decides to bleed you dry, meanwhile she's fucking some hung stud to make her feel alive again as her 10,000 dollar necklace bounces off her 5,000 dollar breasts as the hung stud (whom you hired as her personal trainer, btw) bangs her silly on the hood of the brand new BMW you bought her last week to make up for not walking the fucking dog (also a gift from you)!
Good god! I have no respect for men who do this. Little wimpy bitches who can't talk to their women! It's even worse when these guys don't actually have the money to "appease" the missus and go into debt or some financial debacle when a simple "sorry" would've sufficed. If that's not good enough for the woman, tell her to go fuck herself! She's probably a souless gold digging whore and isn't worth your time OR money anyway!
To all those rich bastards who can actually afford to buy off their women: My penis is bigger than yours so FUCK YOU!!
Wednesday, December 1, 2004
Sex
I like sex as much as the next person, but lately I haven't really been thinking much about it. Yes, I'm in PHASE ONE, but I usually still think about sex every now and then. Instead I've been thinking a lot about friends and family.
This is a far cry from two weeks ago, when I was INSANELY anxious and very nearly did something about it, but my "go to" girl is currently in a relationship and although, I knew I could get her to come over with a little persuastion, I decided not to. I think these two are good for each other and I don't want to mess that up.
Maybe my lack of interest stems from the fact that I don't want be involved with an empty, meaningless fling during the holidays. It just seems so.... tacky, not to mention pretty pathetic. During this time you're supposed to be with the ones you love. Unfortunately, I don't have a "significant other" to share the holidays with, in fact it's been a pretty crappy year in that department. I take comfort in the fact that I have friends and family to help me get through the holiday blahs. Sometimes that's all you need.
Besides, there's always next year.
This is a far cry from two weeks ago, when I was INSANELY anxious and very nearly did something about it, but my "go to" girl is currently in a relationship and although, I knew I could get her to come over with a little persuastion, I decided not to. I think these two are good for each other and I don't want to mess that up.
Maybe my lack of interest stems from the fact that I don't want be involved with an empty, meaningless fling during the holidays. It just seems so.... tacky, not to mention pretty pathetic. During this time you're supposed to be with the ones you love. Unfortunately, I don't have a "significant other" to share the holidays with, in fact it's been a pretty crappy year in that department. I take comfort in the fact that I have friends and family to help me get through the holiday blahs. Sometimes that's all you need.
Besides, there's always next year.
My decision (Update)
I have to say that I was quite surprised by all the positive comments left on the 'My decision' post. I expected a much more hostile reaction. I'm glad I was wrong.
I decided it would be more effective if I created a new post addressing said comments.
The main source of tension between us was a lack of communication. Every attempt to do so seemed to make things worse, thus building up feelings of mutual resentment.
Fortunately lines of communication were finally established and I was finally able to purge all hostile emotions feelings towards her out of my system. I don't like holding on to petty grudges or negative emotions about anyone, especially people I care about. To her credit, it's obvious that her training as a socialogist came in handy as she was able to quell her own hostile emotions enough to talk to me in a professional, objective manner.
That's one of the reasons for the blog. It helps me purge all that garbage out of my system or else it will just fester and build inside me until it explodes in a fireball of general nastiness. True, most posts can be pretty inflammatory, but that's what I'm feeling at the time and I make no excuses for it.
I'm also fortunate enough to have a close circle of friends and family to help me cope with whatever is bothering me over the years. Without them I'd probably have a baseball sized ulcer in my gut right now. They are all pretty awesome. Not as awesome as me, but they come pretty close.
Some of you have asked if I will become friends with the ex. I don't know. Like I said before, we've come to an understanding. It doesn't mean that we'll be skipping down the beach together anytime soon.
Although I have plenty of experience establishing friendships with other exes once an understanding is reached, this situation is unique and it's way too early to tell. If it happens, cool, if it doesn't, no hard feelings...
Right now I'm content with simply knowing where I stand which is all I wanted in the first place.
I hope that answers you questions. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to clog my toilet.
I decided it would be more effective if I created a new post addressing said comments.
The main source of tension between us was a lack of communication. Every attempt to do so seemed to make things worse, thus building up feelings of mutual resentment.
Fortunately lines of communication were finally established and I was finally able to purge all hostile emotions feelings towards her out of my system. I don't like holding on to petty grudges or negative emotions about anyone, especially people I care about. To her credit, it's obvious that her training as a socialogist came in handy as she was able to quell her own hostile emotions enough to talk to me in a professional, objective manner.
That's one of the reasons for the blog. It helps me purge all that garbage out of my system or else it will just fester and build inside me until it explodes in a fireball of general nastiness. True, most posts can be pretty inflammatory, but that's what I'm feeling at the time and I make no excuses for it.
I'm also fortunate enough to have a close circle of friends and family to help me cope with whatever is bothering me over the years. Without them I'd probably have a baseball sized ulcer in my gut right now. They are all pretty awesome. Not as awesome as me, but they come pretty close.
Some of you have asked if I will become friends with the ex. I don't know. Like I said before, we've come to an understanding. It doesn't mean that we'll be skipping down the beach together anytime soon.
Although I have plenty of experience establishing friendships with other exes once an understanding is reached, this situation is unique and it's way too early to tell. If it happens, cool, if it doesn't, no hard feelings...
Right now I'm content with simply knowing where I stand which is all I wanted in the first place.
I hope that answers you questions. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to clog my toilet.
Tuesday, November 30, 2004
Back from Iraq (part 2)
Well I just got back from visiting my friend's house and checking up on her little bro/former punching bag of mine who was injured from Iraq. While driving there I was a nervous wreck of emotions because honestly I didn't know what I would find since no one would give any clear description of his injuries. All I knew is that his arm and leg were hurt in an explosion and it required reconstructive surgery.
This family is so notoriously low key, he could've had half his torso blown away for all I'd known. Of course watching Born On the Fourth of July a few days earlier did nothing to ease my apprehension.
Well I'm happy to report that his injuries were not quite as severe as I had imagined. True, his arm and leg were immobilized, but he was still able get around under his own power. To my surprise, he was in pretty good spirits for someone who stared death in the face and lived. He had been gone for almost a year and I hadn't seen him in about 3 years, but it was like he had never left. I went into auto-pilot and the first thing I called him was "Tiny Tim" as he hobbled up to greet me. That made him crack up and the tension I was feeling was soon lifted as I continued to make light of his situation.
It was so surreal seeing this little kid I used to kick around all those years ago grown into a man. Although he is in his early twenties I could tell that being in Iraq has aged him. When I looked into his eyes, he looked like a man far beyond his years. There's no telling what he had seen or experienced during his tour, especially since he was right in the thick of the fighting or what kind of long term psychological effect it has had on him. I didn't care. I wasn't there to hear war stories. I was there to visit a friend. He's an impressive guy though. He still believes in why he's over there and is actually anxious in rejoining his buddies in Iraq. At first I thought it was typical military brain washing, but I could tell that he meant this from the bottom of his heart.
Speaking of which, I asked him if I could borrow his Purple Heart to pick up chicks. He told me I could after he was done with it.
Well after an hour of making fun of his god awful "jar head" hair cut and acknowledging that his scars were "more manly", (including a really cool one across his head) than mine, I talked to his mother in the kitchen. The first thing she asked me is what I thought about her daughter's new boyfriend. I said he looked like a pretty good guy. She looked at me and said, "he's an idiot". I was surprised and asked her why. She said that I was the best thing to happen to her daughter because I was the only one who "didn't take her bullshit". She had a point there. This particular ex tended to bull over her men until she meant me. She goes on to say that the new guy is a complete wimp and does anything she tells him to do. She went on to say that I was the only boyfriend she actually liked. This made me feel pretty good and I gave her a hug. I'm still fairly good friends with her daughter and all, but I think the main reason I keep her in my life is so I could still keep in touch with her incredible family.... I'm pretty sure she's adopted anyway.
Well it started getting late and I decided to head out, but not before poking "Tiny Tim's" leg with a stick. I said my good byes and left. I had a lot to think about on the way home. My problems just seemed so fucking petty compared to what this kid is going through. Plus the fact that he truly believes in what he is doing in Iraq and not having the attitude of "having to do it", like other people I know, makes me that more impressed with this guy. I don't necessarily agree with him, but I respect the hell out him. Plus like I said before--it's not about politics or personal agendas or any soapbox bullshit like that. It's about visiting a friend.
This family is so notoriously low key, he could've had half his torso blown away for all I'd known. Of course watching Born On the Fourth of July a few days earlier did nothing to ease my apprehension.
Well I'm happy to report that his injuries were not quite as severe as I had imagined. True, his arm and leg were immobilized, but he was still able get around under his own power. To my surprise, he was in pretty good spirits for someone who stared death in the face and lived. He had been gone for almost a year and I hadn't seen him in about 3 years, but it was like he had never left. I went into auto-pilot and the first thing I called him was "Tiny Tim" as he hobbled up to greet me. That made him crack up and the tension I was feeling was soon lifted as I continued to make light of his situation.
It was so surreal seeing this little kid I used to kick around all those years ago grown into a man. Although he is in his early twenties I could tell that being in Iraq has aged him. When I looked into his eyes, he looked like a man far beyond his years. There's no telling what he had seen or experienced during his tour, especially since he was right in the thick of the fighting or what kind of long term psychological effect it has had on him. I didn't care. I wasn't there to hear war stories. I was there to visit a friend. He's an impressive guy though. He still believes in why he's over there and is actually anxious in rejoining his buddies in Iraq. At first I thought it was typical military brain washing, but I could tell that he meant this from the bottom of his heart.
Speaking of which, I asked him if I could borrow his Purple Heart to pick up chicks. He told me I could after he was done with it.
Well after an hour of making fun of his god awful "jar head" hair cut and acknowledging that his scars were "more manly", (including a really cool one across his head) than mine, I talked to his mother in the kitchen. The first thing she asked me is what I thought about her daughter's new boyfriend. I said he looked like a pretty good guy. She looked at me and said, "he's an idiot". I was surprised and asked her why. She said that I was the best thing to happen to her daughter because I was the only one who "didn't take her bullshit". She had a point there. This particular ex tended to bull over her men until she meant me. She goes on to say that the new guy is a complete wimp and does anything she tells him to do. She went on to say that I was the only boyfriend she actually liked. This made me feel pretty good and I gave her a hug. I'm still fairly good friends with her daughter and all, but I think the main reason I keep her in my life is so I could still keep in touch with her incredible family.... I'm pretty sure she's adopted anyway.
Well it started getting late and I decided to head out, but not before poking "Tiny Tim's" leg with a stick. I said my good byes and left. I had a lot to think about on the way home. My problems just seemed so fucking petty compared to what this kid is going through. Plus the fact that he truly believes in what he is doing in Iraq and not having the attitude of "having to do it", like other people I know, makes me that more impressed with this guy. I don't necessarily agree with him, but I respect the hell out him. Plus like I said before--it's not about politics or personal agendas or any soapbox bullshit like that. It's about visiting a friend.
Being a fucking man
I've noticed a lotta pussy behavior happening lately that just makes me sick and ashamed of being a man. So in my infinite manly awesomeness, I decided to compile a short list on what it takes to be a FUCKING MAN!
What it takes to be a FUCKING MAN:
- Always sticking up for yourself
- Never relying on others to do the work for you
- Being able to admit to your mistakes
- Always being able to accept the consequences of you actions
- Never squealing on a buddy. (unless you're threatened by death or prison)
- Not backing down or apologizing for something you didn't even do!
- NEVER hitting your kids. Unless they do something to deserve it.
- Not feeling compelled to put down the toilet seat
- Being able to talk to women. They're not gonna bite you, dumbass!
- Being your kids' FATHER, not their fucking best friend!
- Not giving in to peer pressure!
- Not being afraid of the truth. Yeah, it hurts sometimes, but it's better than living a lie.
- Being able to let go. Dude, it's over... let her go for god's sake!
- NEVER hitting a woman. No matter how much the bitch may deserve it!
- NEVER taking shit FROM a woman who tries to control you.
- Not being afraid to admit you actually have feelings (without being a wuss of course)
- Men don't whine. We rant.
- Men don't get scared. We merely get taken off guard.
- Not making lame excuses
- Never weaseling out of things...unless you're really good at it.
- Refuse to be enslaved by the dreaded almighty vagina.
Hope that helps some of you guys get yer balls back.
What it takes to be a FUCKING MAN:
- Always sticking up for yourself
- Never relying on others to do the work for you
- Being able to admit to your mistakes
- Always being able to accept the consequences of you actions
- Never squealing on a buddy. (unless you're threatened by death or prison)
- Not backing down or apologizing for something you didn't even do!
- NEVER hitting your kids. Unless they do something to deserve it.
- Not feeling compelled to put down the toilet seat
- Being able to talk to women. They're not gonna bite you, dumbass!
- Being your kids' FATHER, not their fucking best friend!
- Not giving in to peer pressure!
- Not being afraid of the truth. Yeah, it hurts sometimes, but it's better than living a lie.
- Being able to let go. Dude, it's over... let her go for god's sake!
- NEVER hitting a woman. No matter how much the bitch may deserve it!
- NEVER taking shit FROM a woman who tries to control you.
- Not being afraid to admit you actually have feelings (without being a wuss of course)
- Men don't whine. We rant.
- Men don't get scared. We merely get taken off guard.
- Not making lame excuses
- Never weaseling out of things...unless you're really good at it.
- Refuse to be enslaved by the dreaded almighty vagina.
Hope that helps some of you guys get yer balls back.
Back from Iraq
Just got a voice mail from a friend of mine telling me her brother who was injured in Iraq is arrived home today. Guess I'm finally going to see the extent of his injuries. I know they weren't horrendous or anything, but it was still enough for him to be shipped back home...at least for awhile. This is going to be so weird.
Seeing the light!
victory is indeed mine
Well after spending most of Monday night with a friend of mine, hanging out at Best Buy and mocking a bunch of drunken karaoke singers at some cheesy bar. I found out that she did NOT know anything about Family Guy!! Well, THAT simply would not do! We quickly jumped into my car and drove to my place where I pulled out volume one of Family Guy!
I decided to start out with the disc that had one of my favorite episodes called "Death is a Bitch". I popped the sucker in and let the good times roll! We stayed up around 3am watching the incomparable genius that is Family Guy and I'm pleased to admit that I have converted a new follower! She loved it (of course) and she instantly found herself drawn to Stewie, the homicidal psychopathic toddler that is beloved by people everywhere! Of course I had to restrain myself from striking her down and casting her off my couch when she asked the occassional "blasphemous" questions, but I quickly reminded myself that she is just a noob and didn't know any better.
Anyway, this is good news! It's always good to enlighten yet another wayward soul to the power of Family Guy! I look forward to sharing the three other discs with my eagar protege.
She's a little bit of TERRIFIC! I think I'll keep her around for awhile.
Monday, November 29, 2004
Alexander movie review *SPOILERS* sorta...
few men can resist his charm
I saw Alexander last night... Oliver Stone took a war epic and made it gay softcore porn. The one ROSARIO DAWSON (my future wife) sex scene showcasing her enormous fun bags was ruined with colin in all his horrible accent, ugly ass mullet glory, hugging, kissing, molesting and exchanging meaningful glances with Jared Leto and an obscenely pretty slave boy in every other scene.
mmmm....Rosario......soon you'll be mine.....
And the accents in this movie were fucking HORRIBLE. Colin sounds like he should be knocking out kangaroos with a boomerang (g'day), Angelina sounds like Count Dracula's wife (blah!), and half of the fucking army sound like they all JUST walked off the Braveheart set and wandered into the wrong movie.
Colin Ferrel looks terrible with a mullet, I kept thinking that he was wearing a wife beater under that girly toga of his. Y'know, Forget the mullet, the entire BLONDE hair was just fucked up. Oh yeah, and the shot of Colin's jiggling hairy balls was something I didn't need to see.
Man, I'm secure enough in my manly heterosexuality to admit when a guy is good looking or not, but I've never seen the appeal of Colin Farrel. I see him as some sort of like the missing link...with his overtly large brow/forehead hooded over his eyes, and cro magnon-esque eyebrows. Scientists should capture him, tag him and release him in the wild to study the habits of this evolutionary throwback.
Also, the movie is too damn long. Being a long movie isn't necessarily bad, but this movie is slow, and excruciating to sit through.
I wouldn't go as far as saying it sucks, it's below average. No I changed my mind-- this movie REALLY sucked donkey balls! It wasn't handled professionally. There are only two action scenes in the movie and they were both edited badly.... very badly.
Oh did I mention all the blatant MAN SEX? Seriously, I don't wanna sit through 3 hours of dudes making out and scantily clad trannies prancing all over the place! Felt like I was in the middle of an episode of "Queer As Folk." Ack!
Overall this movie is just a butt-numbingly torturous, agonizingly bad, socially awkward, incredibly disappointing 3 hour long exercise of PAIN. This movie should be used as an instrument of torture. If captured Al Queda members were forced to watch this movie, Osama Bin Landen would be a anal receptical in our prisons, this "war" on terror would be over within a few months and our boys would be back home.
Stay away from this shitbag of a movie.
Sunday, November 28, 2004
MORE ex drama (Nashville edition)
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Friday, November 26, 2004
Surviving Black Friday
cold....so...cold...laughing...
lingere..... so many carts.... coffee.... pretty...moon...
30 minutes.... oh god... it's not here! ..... carts everywhere... where is it!! Oh god...no.... running...women.... pregnant.... found it!!... I can't feel my toes.... this isn't right.
Kill....everyone staring....so tired.... food...sleep... mom? is that you?
the horror..... the horror...
To be continued....
lingere..... so many carts.... coffee.... pretty...moon...
30 minutes.... oh god... it's not here! ..... carts everywhere... where is it!! Oh god...no.... running...women.... pregnant.... found it!!... I can't feel my toes.... this isn't right.
Kill....everyone staring....so tired.... food...sleep... mom? is that you?
the horror..... the horror...
To be continued....
Quick T-day recap
-Great food as always.
-Sister's driving scares the hell outta me!
-I have to jog to keep up with my 6'8 brother in law's walking
-Mom asked how the ex was doing. (of course)
-Ate a lotta food
-Dominated the T-day video game tournament
-Confronted and destroyed fat, rude as hell Block Buster bitch.
-Ate a lotta food
-My cat may be looking for a place to die.
-Got hit on by some random chick.
-My niece was actually nice to me.
-Everyone laughed at me at the dinner table....again.
-Ate a lotta food to compensate.
-Repressed urge to break my dad's camera.
-My parents made me power of attorney over their Will.
- Watched a horror movie that turned out to be soft core lesbian porn.....with my MOTHER. She didn't seem to mind.
-Fixed my dad's computer yet again.
-Ate a lotta food.
-Had an interesting debate about the war in Iraq with my parents and brother in law.
-Had trouble getting my belt on.
-I think my colon exploded.
-Cock blocked by my sister.
-Planned on helping my brother move into his new place.
-Had fun making fun of my psychotic ex-roommate with the family.
-Passed out for awhile.
-Got home.
-Killing time before heading out to the stores.
THE END.
-Sister's driving scares the hell outta me!
-I have to jog to keep up with my 6'8 brother in law's walking
-Mom asked how the ex was doing. (of course)
-Ate a lotta food
-Dominated the T-day video game tournament
-Confronted and destroyed fat, rude as hell Block Buster bitch.
-Ate a lotta food
-My cat may be looking for a place to die.
-Got hit on by some random chick.
-My niece was actually nice to me.
-Everyone laughed at me at the dinner table....again.
-Ate a lotta food to compensate.
-Repressed urge to break my dad's camera.
-My parents made me power of attorney over their Will.
- Watched a horror movie that turned out to be soft core lesbian porn.....with my MOTHER. She didn't seem to mind.
-Fixed my dad's computer yet again.
-Ate a lotta food.
-Had an interesting debate about the war in Iraq with my parents and brother in law.
-Had trouble getting my belt on.
-I think my colon exploded.
-Cock blocked by my sister.
-Planned on helping my brother move into his new place.
-Had fun making fun of my psychotic ex-roommate with the family.
-Passed out for awhile.
-Got home.
-Killing time before heading out to the stores.
THE END.
Results from the 4th annual T-day video game tournament.
There were no set brackets or anything, just whoever wondered into the game room throughout the day.
Tekken Tag Tournament:
-Me: 22-2
-Ed (bro-in-law): 16-30
-Sister: 5-28
-Mom: 7-15
Mortal Kombat Deception:
-Me: 18-9
-Ed: 12-24
-Sister: 3-15
-Mom: 5-10
-Dad: 0-1
Tekken 4:
-Me: 34-0
-Ed: 16-18
-Sis: 2-6
-Mom: 4-12
-Bro: 0-2
Tekken Tag Tournament:
-Me: 22-2
-Ed (bro-in-law): 16-30
-Sister: 5-28
-Mom: 7-15
Mortal Kombat Deception:
-Me: 18-9
-Ed: 12-24
-Sister: 3-15
-Mom: 5-10
-Dad: 0-1
Tekken 4:
-Me: 34-0
-Ed: 16-18
-Sis: 2-6
-Mom: 4-12
-Bro: 0-2
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
My decision
I've decided to keep the posts about the ex off of the blog.
Now before any of you start busting my chops, I make NO apologies about writing the posts in the first place and do not feel ashamed for what I did. I exercised my right to express myself and I stand by every word with every fiber in my being.
Some of you may consider it a sign of weakness or an attempt to coddle the ex by removing the entries. Untrue. This is simply a gesture of respect...nothing more, nothing less. The posts served their purpose in helping me get over a bump in my life and move on. There was really no need to keep them posted.
Yeah, I like to rant, rave and bitch like a madman, but I know when it's time to employ rational, objective behavior. By being professional and keeping a cool head, I was able to come to an understanding with the ex. This wouldn't have been possible if I got dragged into a petty name calling contest. That never solves anything and I consider myself a problem solver.
I appreciate all the support some of you have shown me,though some of your comments were a tad tasteless and harsh, I appreciate it all the same. Thank you.
I know if some of you were in my place, you would rather burn your eye lids off rather than take down the posts, but if you allow someone to antagonize you to the point of such irrational behavior, isn't that a sign of weakness?
It's like refusing to wipe your ass because you don't want to give the toilet paper the satisfaction. Me, on the other hand would rather just wipe my ass, flush the toilet paper, wash my hands and go on my merry little way.
Anyway, it isn't open to debate, I got what I wanted, it's over and I intend to keep it that way. As I've said before, it is a final gesture of respect. The decision was MINE to make and I feel stronger for making it.
Now, I'm gonna get some sleep and prepare myself for some serious T-day gorging!!
Now before any of you start busting my chops, I make NO apologies about writing the posts in the first place and do not feel ashamed for what I did. I exercised my right to express myself and I stand by every word with every fiber in my being.
Some of you may consider it a sign of weakness or an attempt to coddle the ex by removing the entries. Untrue. This is simply a gesture of respect...nothing more, nothing less. The posts served their purpose in helping me get over a bump in my life and move on. There was really no need to keep them posted.
Yeah, I like to rant, rave and bitch like a madman, but I know when it's time to employ rational, objective behavior. By being professional and keeping a cool head, I was able to come to an understanding with the ex. This wouldn't have been possible if I got dragged into a petty name calling contest. That never solves anything and I consider myself a problem solver.
I appreciate all the support some of you have shown me,though some of your comments were a tad tasteless and harsh, I appreciate it all the same. Thank you.
I know if some of you were in my place, you would rather burn your eye lids off rather than take down the posts, but if you allow someone to antagonize you to the point of such irrational behavior, isn't that a sign of weakness?
It's like refusing to wipe your ass because you don't want to give the toilet paper the satisfaction. Me, on the other hand would rather just wipe my ass, flush the toilet paper, wash my hands and go on my merry little way.
Anyway, it isn't open to debate, I got what I wanted, it's over and I intend to keep it that way. As I've said before, it is a final gesture of respect. The decision was MINE to make and I feel stronger for making it.
Now, I'm gonna get some sleep and prepare myself for some serious T-day gorging!!
I owe someone an apology.
I got a new crossover cable and managed to network my family's 2 computers together, but I was having a bit of a problem getting one of the computers to take files from the other. The FTp server (WarFTP) was running fine, both IPs checked out, but nothing was happening! I called up my tech geek friend for some advice, he suggested that maybe they weren't set up on the same subnet. I told him to shut the hell up! Of course they were! Of course, when I checked, they weren't.... CRAP!! So freakin' simple!!!
Yeah, time to start eatin' that humble pie.
Yeah, time to start eatin' that humble pie.
KJ's back in town!
KJ, my long time friend and one of my last surviving MALE friends came into town yesterday from DC for the holidays. Man, being in the FBI has really whipped him into shape! He was looking lean mean and capable of kicking all sorts of ass! (ooo! be still my heart!)
Anyway, it was soooo nice to be shootin' the shit with one of the GUYS again! Don't get me wrong, I love all my female friends to death, but every once and awhile you need to be with your own kind! Get a little dose of testestorone in the ol' veins and have a nice manly conversation!
We talked about everything from politics to the latest movies and of course-- women.
He told me this particular story about how some co-worker is trying to get him to express his feelings, trying to get him to "open up", but of course Kenny wasn't having any of it. While listening to this, I kinda of chuckled to myself... I must've sounded just as annoying to my emotionally stunted ex. Kenny told the woman that yes, he is sheltering his emotions because:
A, He barely knows her.
B. He feels no need to explain his feelings to her.
C. HE'S A MAN!
The last one cracked me up because that is so KJ. Good to see he's not a complete government drone. We both agreed that the woman was obviously interested in him and was just trying to find out what he's about. I told him chicks dig enigmas! I just kept picturing them in a dusty interrogation room as she drills KJ for info under the hot lights! He said he's kinda wary about dating a co-worker which I can understand completely.
He asked me about my woman situation and I told him about my "interesting" year with women culminating to the "affair" with the married chick. KJ chuckled, shook his head and just said "Damn. Women are a beautiful pain in the ass." No questions about details. No holding my hand and encouraging me to talk about it and no sissy group hug crap. Nope, we just started talking about sports. That's when I knew how much I truly missed hanging with the guys! Life is lot less complicated that way. I don't have to hear complaints about weight issues every 15 minutes, no vivid descriptions about "feminine" problems. I don't have to think about the best "lie" to come up with when asked by a girl if they look fat in a certain outfit. (Yes, everyone knows that stating the truth equals certain bitchy death.), no listening to your female friend ceaselessly prattling about a bunch of "bitches" that pissed her off despite the fact that you've never heard of any of them and don't give a damn, and of course, no enduring the monthly MONSTER.
Hanging out with women has made me waaay too "sensitive". Of course it's not all bad, but I've got to have a balance.
I then told him about the PHASES and he laughed and told me that was classic Vincent. I'll take that as a compliment by god!
A third manly man male friend was supposed to join us, but he called in and said he couldn't make it, but he said he was free tonight. I'm really looking forward to it.
Anyway, it was soooo nice to be shootin' the shit with one of the GUYS again! Don't get me wrong, I love all my female friends to death, but every once and awhile you need to be with your own kind! Get a little dose of testestorone in the ol' veins and have a nice manly conversation!
We talked about everything from politics to the latest movies and of course-- women.
He told me this particular story about how some co-worker is trying to get him to express his feelings, trying to get him to "open up", but of course Kenny wasn't having any of it. While listening to this, I kinda of chuckled to myself... I must've sounded just as annoying to my emotionally stunted ex. Kenny told the woman that yes, he is sheltering his emotions because:
A, He barely knows her.
B. He feels no need to explain his feelings to her.
C. HE'S A MAN!
The last one cracked me up because that is so KJ. Good to see he's not a complete government drone. We both agreed that the woman was obviously interested in him and was just trying to find out what he's about. I told him chicks dig enigmas! I just kept picturing them in a dusty interrogation room as she drills KJ for info under the hot lights! He said he's kinda wary about dating a co-worker which I can understand completely.
He asked me about my woman situation and I told him about my "interesting" year with women culminating to the "affair" with the married chick. KJ chuckled, shook his head and just said "Damn. Women are a beautiful pain in the ass." No questions about details. No holding my hand and encouraging me to talk about it and no sissy group hug crap. Nope, we just started talking about sports. That's when I knew how much I truly missed hanging with the guys! Life is lot less complicated that way. I don't have to hear complaints about weight issues every 15 minutes, no vivid descriptions about "feminine" problems. I don't have to think about the best "lie" to come up with when asked by a girl if they look fat in a certain outfit. (Yes, everyone knows that stating the truth equals certain bitchy death.), no listening to your female friend ceaselessly prattling about a bunch of "bitches" that pissed her off despite the fact that you've never heard of any of them and don't give a damn, and of course, no enduring the monthly MONSTER.
Hanging out with women has made me waaay too "sensitive". Of course it's not all bad, but I've got to have a balance.
I then told him about the PHASES and he laughed and told me that was classic Vincent. I'll take that as a compliment by god!
A third manly man male friend was supposed to join us, but he called in and said he couldn't make it, but he said he was free tonight. I'm really looking forward to it.
Tuesday, November 23, 2004
Okay, I really do suck!
Last night I was pissed off at a friend of mine because she abruptly had to get off the phone and told me that she would call me back. Now normally this wouldn't bother me, but I was in the middle of telling her about a rather personal event in my life and she cut me off. She did this despite the fact that I had previously invested hundreds of hours I listening to all her tales of woe.
When I need her to listen to me she cuts ME off?!! To add insult to injury, she never called me back. Uggh!
Of course this annoyed me to no end.
The next day at work I was thinking of all kinds of nasty little ways I could tear her a new asshole for having DARED hang up on me and not fufilling her promise of not calling me back! The very nerve of the woman!!
Satisfied with a suitable punishment, I decided to check my voice mail before calling her to deliver her fate. She had left a message. She apologized that she couldn't call me back because she learned that a good friend of hers had died and she was having problems coping, but she still managed to tell me to have fun with my friends and she would try to call me later on tonight.
Okay.... you know when you go take a massive dump,but you're so constipated that you only squirt out that little piece of fecal nugget that goes *plip*?
Well, that's exactly how I felt. I'm glad I called the voice mail first!
It's so cool being me!
When I need her to listen to me she cuts ME off?!! To add insult to injury, she never called me back. Uggh!
Of course this annoyed me to no end.
The next day at work I was thinking of all kinds of nasty little ways I could tear her a new asshole for having DARED hang up on me and not fufilling her promise of not calling me back! The very nerve of the woman!!
Satisfied with a suitable punishment, I decided to check my voice mail before calling her to deliver her fate. She had left a message. She apologized that she couldn't call me back because she learned that a good friend of hers had died and she was having problems coping, but she still managed to tell me to have fun with my friends and she would try to call me later on tonight.
Okay.... you know when you go take a massive dump,but you're so constipated that you only squirt out that little piece of fecal nugget that goes *plip*?
Well, that's exactly how I felt. I'm glad I called the voice mail first!
It's so cool being me!
Holy MOLEy
I really don't see where this crap came from. The fact is, mole = flaw. I see moles just like any other flaws-- scars, odd discolorations, lesions, blisters, pimples, burn marks, etc. It's like if you had a beautiful Aston Martin car from a James Bond film...and the thing has a damn bullet hole on the hood. I never heard anyone say "Oh my god! Those varicose veins are soooo fuckin' HOT!" "Beauty mark" my ENTIRE ass. That's a flaw. Of course it isn't serious enough to make a hot woman suddenly unfuckable, but still...she would be much hotter without that little shitmark on her face.
Amanda Byrum(host of The Swan) is a good example....besides the turd on her face, she's pretty damn good looking, especially with that accent. She really should hit up one of those doctors on the show, and see if they would cut that off with a laser or something.
*sidenote--the dentist on there...Dr. Sherri Worth = 9.2.
*edit--------and yeah, I also found it funny that women would make fake moles some years ago. It was almost as hilariously stupid as in the 80s when women wore those fuck awful shoulder pads when dressing up. (made them look like NFL linebackers in drag)
Amanda Byrum(host of The Swan) is a good example....besides the turd on her face, she's pretty damn good looking, especially with that accent. She really should hit up one of those doctors on the show, and see if they would cut that off with a laser or something.
*sidenote--the dentist on there...Dr. Sherri Worth = 9.2.
*edit--------and yeah, I also found it funny that women would make fake moles some years ago. It was almost as hilariously stupid as in the 80s when women wore those fuck awful shoulder pads when dressing up. (made them look like NFL linebackers in drag)
Here we go again.
forgot his name again
May be old news, but I'm gonna rant about it anyway, dammit! Apparently they've found out that Iran has been trying to modify their missles to carry a nuclear payload! HOLY SHIT!!! OH MY GOD!!! THEM PESKY AXIS OF EVIL FELLAS GOT SUM WMDS!!! There's only one thing to do! Bomb their peace hatin' camel ridin' Allah worshippin' evil sumbitches for the sake of democracy and the American way! God bless America because we all know that God likes us the best anyways! Just ask DUB-YUH! yeeehaaa!!!
Sheesh... makes you wonder if the draft will become a reality. Well of course we're going to need all the red blooded American boys we can muster to throw at the next uppity country that gets too big for its britchesr! If they get killed or hideously injured, why it's nothing a Purple Heart and a heart felt salute can't fix!
Normally I don't give a shit about this, but now that I know people actually fighting and getting hurt in this "war", I guess I'm flip flopping. Now I'm not gonna turn into some dirty liberal hippie freak, but I know when no good shennanigans are happening when I see them. Plus if there is a draft, I could very well get drafted myself since the age limit is 44 years for my former specialty. Wonderful... soon I'll be blogging and bitching from North Korea.
Monday, November 22, 2004
The Phases explained
Okay a couple of people have requested that I explain what the PHASES are.
Well the PHASES are a series of behaviors I tend to go through whenever I'm sick of the whole exhausting effort of the pursuit of women:
PHASE ONE: The forsaking of women for food and video games. Simple and straight forward. My energies are now focused on these two other loves in my life.
PHASE TWO: Self indulgence. No, it doesn't mean jerkin' off to German porn (not entirely) it means that I just dust off the credit cards and cater to myself by going on extended road trips, buying expensive "toys" that I don't need, getting some new furniture, eat at expensive restaurants, etc. Also known as the "yuppie stage."
PHASE THREE: Unbridled debauchery. Basically I call up on all fuck buddies that I've been putting off for months, stock up on the condoms and just have a good ol' fashioned, meaningless, empty, no strings attached series of flings. By the time I'm done, I expect the woman to be dressed and walking out the door before I walk out of the bathroom. None of this cuddling/talking bullshit. The sex is usually much more aggressive as well. It's a Great way to dust off the cobwebs and polish certain techniques.
These phases can last anywhere from a couple of months to a year. Sometimes I've been known to skip around, but this is this is the usual order.
Afterwards, I go back to being Mr. Nice guy, aka, Chump Mode and start once again, looking for "Ms. Right" to share a beautiful and meaningful relationship with.
Hope that helps!
Well the PHASES are a series of behaviors I tend to go through whenever I'm sick of the whole exhausting effort of the pursuit of women:
PHASE ONE: The forsaking of women for food and video games. Simple and straight forward. My energies are now focused on these two other loves in my life.
PHASE TWO: Self indulgence. No, it doesn't mean jerkin' off to German porn (not entirely) it means that I just dust off the credit cards and cater to myself by going on extended road trips, buying expensive "toys" that I don't need, getting some new furniture, eat at expensive restaurants, etc. Also known as the "yuppie stage."
PHASE THREE: Unbridled debauchery. Basically I call up on all fuck buddies that I've been putting off for months, stock up on the condoms and just have a good ol' fashioned, meaningless, empty, no strings attached series of flings. By the time I'm done, I expect the woman to be dressed and walking out the door before I walk out of the bathroom. None of this cuddling/talking bullshit. The sex is usually much more aggressive as well. It's a Great way to dust off the cobwebs and polish certain techniques.
These phases can last anywhere from a couple of months to a year. Sometimes I've been known to skip around, but this is this is the usual order.
Afterwards, I go back to being Mr. Nice guy, aka, Chump Mode and start once again, looking for "Ms. Right" to share a beautiful and meaningful relationship with.
Hope that helps!
Random gym rant.
Went to the gym Sunday to get a little cardio in and take a kick boxing class because I realized that I was big ol' fat ass! Anyway, I got there kind of early for the class so I did some manly eliptical machines on level fucking 20 baby!!
15 minutes later after I peeled myself off the floor I decide to roam around the gym, checking out the ladies. There were quite a few roaming around for some odd reason.
Eventually I run into Kate and I apologized to her for snapping her head off a couple days ago, she punched me in the chest and said it was cool, but she couldn't really talk since she had a lot to do at work.
The time came around for kickboxing and I almost shit myself when I saw Genna, the instructor. Well apparently she got her ass knocked up because she was fucking as big as a double wide! She was at least 8 months along for fuck's sake! I was thinking to myself there was no way this pregnasaurus is going to be teaching the fucking class. WRONG!! She was!!!
Well this threw off my groove completely because the only thing I could concentrate on was he and her bulbous routund belly bouncing up and down and I just KNEW that her water was going to break and I was going to neck deep in babies!!
I mean what the FUCK is this meat wad thinking??
A little history about her: supposedly she's a devote catholic "good girl" who believes in family values and good wholesome living through God, Jesus, Mary or whoever the hell they worship and having children out of wedlock is the ultimate sin! Heaven forbid! Well look at her now! Just another K-town statistic and another victim of the pregnancy virus!
Anyway, this dumb ass has always been one skittle short of a rainbow and this just confirmed her bubble headed insanity!
It was so distracting that I almost didn't notice an exquisite piece of female joy candy that had an impossible shaped ass. This thing just seemed to.... hover and I believe it possessed intelligence because it seemed to...beacon me to come closer...to touch it...caress it... to bask in its glory! It also seemed to be communicating with my pants!
Then I remembered that I was in PHASE ONE and I was able to break free from its deadly grip! HAHAHAHAHA!!! TAKE THAT EVIL ONION BOOTY! YOU HAVE NO POWER OVER ME!! BEGONE!!!
Where was I? Oh yeah. Stupid ass catholic pregnant women shouldn't teach kickboxing!
15 minutes later after I peeled myself off the floor I decide to roam around the gym, checking out the ladies. There were quite a few roaming around for some odd reason.
Eventually I run into Kate and I apologized to her for snapping her head off a couple days ago, she punched me in the chest and said it was cool, but she couldn't really talk since she had a lot to do at work.
The time came around for kickboxing and I almost shit myself when I saw Genna, the instructor. Well apparently she got her ass knocked up because she was fucking as big as a double wide! She was at least 8 months along for fuck's sake! I was thinking to myself there was no way this pregnasaurus is going to be teaching the fucking class. WRONG!! She was!!!
Well this threw off my groove completely because the only thing I could concentrate on was he and her bulbous routund belly bouncing up and down and I just KNEW that her water was going to break and I was going to neck deep in babies!!
I mean what the FUCK is this meat wad thinking??
A little history about her: supposedly she's a devote catholic "good girl" who believes in family values and good wholesome living through God, Jesus, Mary or whoever the hell they worship and having children out of wedlock is the ultimate sin! Heaven forbid! Well look at her now! Just another K-town statistic and another victim of the pregnancy virus!
Anyway, this dumb ass has always been one skittle short of a rainbow and this just confirmed her bubble headed insanity!
It was so distracting that I almost didn't notice an exquisite piece of female joy candy that had an impossible shaped ass. This thing just seemed to.... hover and I believe it possessed intelligence because it seemed to...beacon me to come closer...to touch it...caress it... to bask in its glory! It also seemed to be communicating with my pants!
Then I remembered that I was in PHASE ONE and I was able to break free from its deadly grip! HAHAHAHAHA!!! TAKE THAT EVIL ONION BOOTY! YOU HAVE NO POWER OVER ME!! BEGONE!!!
Where was I? Oh yeah. Stupid ass catholic pregnant women shouldn't teach kickboxing!
"Good" news.
I just got an email from a friend of mine whose brother was injured in Iraq, but she never gave any details about the extent of his injuries. So I didn't know if he got a flesh would or his legs wore torn off or worse.
Well apparently he was in a place called Al Anbar Province when the truck he was standing next to was hit by a rocket propelled grenade and he ended up getting shrapnel in his legs and arm. The injuries are extensive enough for him to miss service for awhile. It may sound weird, but that's actually good news for my friend because that means her brother will be home...man what a fucked up situation when you're actually happy that your brother will need reconstructive surgery.
Well, it's good the little punk ass is okay or alive at least. I remember making the little shit "hit himself" and knocking the crap out of him when we played football in the yard, but he never bitched and always got back up.. Now he's fighting a war. He's always been a tough little bastard, so I'm not surprised that he survived. He's also very lucky. If he had been standing just a couple of feet to the left, he would've been blown in half according to his sister. I wonder if he got the Purple Heart.
So strange. I still can't believe I'm typing about this. Seems like this war is affecting more and more people I know and I have a feeling it'll get worse.
Anyway, for now the little bastard is coming back home. I look forward to comparing scars with him again, though I think he's gonna beat me this time.
Well apparently he was in a place called Al Anbar Province when the truck he was standing next to was hit by a rocket propelled grenade and he ended up getting shrapnel in his legs and arm. The injuries are extensive enough for him to miss service for awhile. It may sound weird, but that's actually good news for my friend because that means her brother will be home...man what a fucked up situation when you're actually happy that your brother will need reconstructive surgery.
Well, it's good the little punk ass is okay or alive at least. I remember making the little shit "hit himself" and knocking the crap out of him when we played football in the yard, but he never bitched and always got back up.. Now he's fighting a war. He's always been a tough little bastard, so I'm not surprised that he survived. He's also very lucky. If he had been standing just a couple of feet to the left, he would've been blown in half according to his sister. I wonder if he got the Purple Heart.
So strange. I still can't believe I'm typing about this. Seems like this war is affecting more and more people I know and I have a feeling it'll get worse.
Anyway, for now the little bastard is coming back home. I look forward to comparing scars with him again, though I think he's gonna beat me this time.
Battered women
Anyway, now I'm intrigued with the Battered women Syndrome. Actually I've had an interest in this for years now. Probably started when a friend of mine in 10th grade was being abused by her senior boyfriend. One of the strongest girls, smartest girls I knew was reduced to a quivering, fearful, scared little girl, yet he never laid a hand on her. Up until that point I always thought that abused women was solely a physical thing. I know better now and I've been intrigued ever since and my current situation with the "ex" has rekindled that interest.
The Psychological stages of abuse are:
DENIAL- basically the woman doesn't want to admit she's in a messed up relationship and calls each instance of abuse as an "accident".
GUILT- finally realizes she's in a messed up relationship, but thinks she deserves the abuse.
ENLIGHTENMENT- realizes she's does not deserve the abuse, but sticks around to "make things work" (oh brother).
RESPONSIBILITY- realizes that he's never going to change and actually leaves him to find someone new.
However, that's where the "Honeymoon" stage comes in. Where the guy basically sweet talks her into taking him back and this inevitably leads to the "tension" and "incident" phases, basically starting the whole cycle over again.
Now this is nothing "official" or anything, but this is what I'VE seen. I've only witnessed a few instances of physical abuse, but I have seen a lot of situations of psychological abuse. Usually the women have had a string of similar abusive relationships or grew up in that type of enviroment so in their minds, this is actually a normal relationship.
Sometimes they know the guy is no good for them, but for some reason they delude themselves into staying with them. Now I've seen highly intelligent strong willed women do this time and time again and it just boggles my mind. Poor self-image? Who knows. In some cases the girl actually convinces herself that she's in control by "punishing" the abuser, but in the end, she always succumbs to the man's "sweet talk" (Honeymoon) and she goes right back to him. Who's in control?
Trying to talk sense into them is useless, especially when they don't want to listen and sometimes they even snap at the person trying to help them. Personally my patience is too limited for that. I'm not an expert by any means. I'm just telling you what I've experienced as articulately as I can.
This is the first time that where I've been personally involved with a person going through this (I usually try to limit personal ties) and I can't help but find it very.... fascinating. Weird, I know, but I'm curious to see how this plays out.
Since I do care about this particular person, I hope things work out for her. I really do. But I have yet to see that happen.
Anyone else with personal or professional experience in this matter is more than welcomed to give their two cents.
The Psychological stages of abuse are:
DENIAL- basically the woman doesn't want to admit she's in a messed up relationship and calls each instance of abuse as an "accident".
GUILT- finally realizes she's in a messed up relationship, but thinks she deserves the abuse.
ENLIGHTENMENT- realizes she's does not deserve the abuse, but sticks around to "make things work" (oh brother).
RESPONSIBILITY- realizes that he's never going to change and actually leaves him to find someone new.
However, that's where the "Honeymoon" stage comes in. Where the guy basically sweet talks her into taking him back and this inevitably leads to the "tension" and "incident" phases, basically starting the whole cycle over again.
Now this is nothing "official" or anything, but this is what I'VE seen. I've only witnessed a few instances of physical abuse, but I have seen a lot of situations of psychological abuse. Usually the women have had a string of similar abusive relationships or grew up in that type of enviroment so in their minds, this is actually a normal relationship.
Sometimes they know the guy is no good for them, but for some reason they delude themselves into staying with them. Now I've seen highly intelligent strong willed women do this time and time again and it just boggles my mind. Poor self-image? Who knows. In some cases the girl actually convinces herself that she's in control by "punishing" the abuser, but in the end, she always succumbs to the man's "sweet talk" (Honeymoon) and she goes right back to him. Who's in control?
Trying to talk sense into them is useless, especially when they don't want to listen and sometimes they even snap at the person trying to help them. Personally my patience is too limited for that. I'm not an expert by any means. I'm just telling you what I've experienced as articulately as I can.
This is the first time that where I've been personally involved with a person going through this (I usually try to limit personal ties) and I can't help but find it very.... fascinating. Weird, I know, but I'm curious to see how this plays out.
Since I do care about this particular person, I hope things work out for her. I really do. But I have yet to see that happen.
Anyone else with personal or professional experience in this matter is more than welcomed to give their two cents.
Sunday, November 21, 2004
Better late than never.
My ex finally admitted that she still loves her ex-boyfriend. Apparently she realized this when she found out that he was going to fight in Iraq. Now personally I think this guy is a racist piece of shit and the scum of the Earth who treated her like crap (big surprise), but according to her he said he really "felt bad" about doing all that to her. Funny how people suddenly have a change of heart when they are about to face death. I'm sure he's found God as well.
I noticed the signs from the beginning:
Her always being defensive whenever I said anything bad about him.
Constantly talking about him to me, but never mentioning me to him.
The far off looks whenever she talked about him.
Overly critical.
Lack of enthusiasm.
Defending his white trash family and friends.
the list goes on...
Well, I guess we'll see if he's being sincere or just doing the whole death bed repentance thing in the next few months. For her sake I hope he's on the level. She needs some happiness in her life, but deep down, I think she's setting herself up for more disappointment. It's a classic example of battered women syndrome and I've seen it happen a million times:
First phase is the "tension building" phase.
Second phase is the initial "incident" phase.
Third phase is the "Honeymoon" phase.
Right now they're in the "Honeymoon" phase. (I'll post more about this in detail later on.)
Hmm... I refer to her as an "ex", but I guess that doesn't quite qualify in this situation.
My only complaint is her waiting so long to finally admit it. The only reason she did so was because I called and asked her directly. No telling when she would've told me if I hadn't asked, if at all. Of course she gave the ol' "I didn't know how I felt until I realized he was leaving me" reason. It was obvious she felt this way about him for a long time before that realization. It would've been nice if she had told me before I invested all that time into the "relationship". How disappointing.
Although I'll never admit this to her, but I should've listened to my sister who told me to get the hell outta Dodge when I told her that the "ex" was still in the picture. Matter of fact, most of my friends said the same thing. Oh well...we all make mistakes and hindsight is always 20/20. Dammit.
I mean she drove 8 hours to Mississippi to see him off. I'd be lucky if I could get her to drive across town. So we'll see what happens.
Why did I hang around as long as I did? Well, when you think you're in "love" *SHUDDER* you do stupid things. I make no excuses. I would've been pissed at myself if I gave up without at least trying because you never know until you do so. If it doesn't work out the way you want it to, you just dust yourself off, go through your PHASES, vent a little on your blog and get right back into it. The alternative is locking yourself up in your room and feeling sorry for yourself like a pussy.
Fucking cunt.
I noticed the signs from the beginning:
Her always being defensive whenever I said anything bad about him.
Constantly talking about him to me, but never mentioning me to him.
The far off looks whenever she talked about him.
Overly critical.
Lack of enthusiasm.
Defending his white trash family and friends.
the list goes on...
Well, I guess we'll see if he's being sincere or just doing the whole death bed repentance thing in the next few months. For her sake I hope he's on the level. She needs some happiness in her life, but deep down, I think she's setting herself up for more disappointment. It's a classic example of battered women syndrome and I've seen it happen a million times:
First phase is the "tension building" phase.
Second phase is the initial "incident" phase.
Third phase is the "Honeymoon" phase.
Right now they're in the "Honeymoon" phase. (I'll post more about this in detail later on.)
Hmm... I refer to her as an "ex", but I guess that doesn't quite qualify in this situation.
My only complaint is her waiting so long to finally admit it. The only reason she did so was because I called and asked her directly. No telling when she would've told me if I hadn't asked, if at all. Of course she gave the ol' "I didn't know how I felt until I realized he was leaving me" reason. It was obvious she felt this way about him for a long time before that realization. It would've been nice if she had told me before I invested all that time into the "relationship". How disappointing.
Although I'll never admit this to her, but I should've listened to my sister who told me to get the hell outta Dodge when I told her that the "ex" was still in the picture. Matter of fact, most of my friends said the same thing. Oh well...we all make mistakes and hindsight is always 20/20. Dammit.
I mean she drove 8 hours to Mississippi to see him off. I'd be lucky if I could get her to drive across town. So we'll see what happens.
Why did I hang around as long as I did? Well, when you think you're in "love" *SHUDDER* you do stupid things. I make no excuses. I would've been pissed at myself if I gave up without at least trying because you never know until you do so. If it doesn't work out the way you want it to, you just dust yourself off, go through your PHASES, vent a little on your blog and get right back into it. The alternative is locking yourself up in your room and feeling sorry for yourself like a pussy.
Fucking cunt.
Insomniatic rambling.
Several days ago I really let me friend have it. I told her how sick I was of her continuing to stay with some asshole who treats her like garbage, lies to her, exploits her emotions for his own gain and basically uses her for sex. I called her a weak, pathetic, jelly spined, loser of a cunt and I was no longer going to be her shoulder to cry on whenever he did or say something that hurt her precious feelings. I was done giving her advice WHICH SHE NEVER LISTENED TO as she repeated the same damn mistakes AGAIN! This shit has gone on for 3 years now! I continued on by telling her if she wants to waste her life by trying to make something happen that'll NEVER happen with this asshole then she could go fuck herself. I was done with it. I closed by calling her a pathetic loser.
I think she was actually turned on.
I think she was actually turned on.
Saturday, November 20, 2004
Why me?
Okay, a friend of my called me a few minutes ago wanting to know if she could come over. Now I used to have a little fling with this particular friend awhile back and when she wanted to "come over", esepecially this late at night, she wants sex. Despite the fact that she now has a boyfriend, she's calling me for sex! Well this is text book what she's trying to pull:
A few weeks ago she told me that she told this guy she loved him and it's freaking her out having these kinds of feelings for someone, let alone TELLING them. Now I believe her feelings for him are genuine and it appears the guy feels the same for her, but this is new territory for her and it's a bit much.
So rather than embrace the unknown and throw herself into an actual exclusive relationship, she opts for the familiar and rings me up for a booty call to force the guy to hate her and dump her.
Sorry, but I'm not biting. Although the fling we had was fun, it's over. She's great looking and everything, but I'm just not sexually attracted to her anymore. She's been permanently filed in my "little sister" database. Secondly, I'm in the middle of PHASE ONE, so she's doubly shit outta luck. Besides.... I'm not a big fan of being used. So I guess that means she triply shit outta luck. Is 'triply' a word? It is now.
I told her if she wanted to ruin a good thing, then she would have to find some other patsy to do her "dirty work".
Like that was going to happen anyway, since she was obviously shitfaced and her friends took her keys away from her. Good for them.
After that, I got ANOTHER call from a different drunk friend of mine who was bitching about her roommates taking away her keys. She got pissed and started walking and that's when she decided to call me, wanting me to pick her up and possibly "have a little fun". Fuck that. I was in the middle of writing my Incredibles movie review and I had just dealt with a drunken bitch. I told her that she was the city's problem and hung up. My place is NOT a fucking drunk tank.
Sheesh... ever since I went into my women hating asshole mode, I've been a drunken horny slut magnet! Lucky me!
A few weeks ago she told me that she told this guy she loved him and it's freaking her out having these kinds of feelings for someone, let alone TELLING them. Now I believe her feelings for him are genuine and it appears the guy feels the same for her, but this is new territory for her and it's a bit much.
So rather than embrace the unknown and throw herself into an actual exclusive relationship, she opts for the familiar and rings me up for a booty call to force the guy to hate her and dump her.
Sorry, but I'm not biting. Although the fling we had was fun, it's over. She's great looking and everything, but I'm just not sexually attracted to her anymore. She's been permanently filed in my "little sister" database. Secondly, I'm in the middle of PHASE ONE, so she's doubly shit outta luck. Besides.... I'm not a big fan of being used. So I guess that means she triply shit outta luck. Is 'triply' a word? It is now.
I told her if she wanted to ruin a good thing, then she would have to find some other patsy to do her "dirty work".
Like that was going to happen anyway, since she was obviously shitfaced and her friends took her keys away from her. Good for them.
After that, I got ANOTHER call from a different drunk friend of mine who was bitching about her roommates taking away her keys. She got pissed and started walking and that's when she decided to call me, wanting me to pick her up and possibly "have a little fun". Fuck that. I was in the middle of writing my Incredibles movie review and I had just dealt with a drunken bitch. I told her that she was the city's problem and hung up. My place is NOT a fucking drunk tank.
Sheesh... ever since I went into my women hating asshole mode, I've been a drunken horny slut magnet! Lucky me!
SpongeBob the movie review
It sucked.
Glad I didn't pay for it, though I feel like I lost 90 minutes of my soul.
Glad I didn't pay for it, though I feel like I lost 90 minutes of my soul.
The Incredibles movie review: SPOILERS EVERYWHERE!
I finally saw the movie yesterday, and thought it was excellent; there also a lot of kids there, but, surprisingly,they were acceptably quite throughout the entire movie except that one little shit that kept yapping about a fucking toy. Fortunately his dad carried him out. Also, surprisingly, this has been the first superhero-ish movie in a while where I haven't gone for the bad guy, which is saying something considering that half of the main protagonists are children. Obviously, I enjoyed Dash and Violet and "Jack-Jack" (I'll just assume that that's a "baby talk" pseudonym for Jack) far too much for it to matter.
While I agree that it's seems like the non-family characters, such as Syndrome, Edna Mode (who was voiced by a guy. The producer I think), and Frozone (who kicked ass, as well as finally gave a suitable explanation--for the time being--for powers over ice), were slightly more impressive and/or likable than the family members. Still, Elastigirl by herself was awesome throughout at least half of the movie, (she has a really thick ass! Which is a good thing!) and I personally would like to see a future one with the children somewhat grown so that we could see what they could actually do with some training.
Yeah, I said before, I extremely liked Frozone, since it was nice to see that he was more than just the "token black guy". And judging by the positive, near-applause reaction with the use of powers at the end of the movie when trying to dodge the Omnidroid v. 10, he was extremely well liked overall. I guess it helps that Samuel L. Jackson is also in EVERYTHING, so people have had more than enough time to get use to the voice, even when it's not swearing.
I felt that this film felt more like a homage to a spy movie than anything else. If anything it probably homaged "Adventure movies" better than "Sky Captain and the World of Tommrow", because it was more subtle than incredibly blatent. A lot of James Bond type references, like the Bubble Transport cars of You Only Live Twice. The music was incredible totally referencing James Bond. And hell, when Dash was dashing through the jungle, it reminded me of Star Wars. As for the 3D...well Pixar outdid themselves again. They didn't make it real looking, they made it LOOK INCREDIBLE. Shit man, just looking at a folded up costume...it just looks INSANE on how cool it looked. The action....really top notch. I'm surprised how great it is. But seriously, with all things that happened, I discussed this with my friend....The Incredibles seemed like the GREATEST film candidate...to be an R-rated film. I mean there's so much stuff they can work with, I would love to see an R-Rated version of The Incredible be released!
Imagine: Sam Jackson...swearing! "Bust through that wall, mutha fucka!"
Edna with an even edgier, sharper wit. "Do you know where your husband is?.....perhaps...FUCKING A WHORE!"
Violet was implied to be almost goth like, why don't we have her actually be goth/emo and try to commit suicide by slitting her wrists? Instead...her forcefields get in the way...BECAUSE SHE'S COWARD..SHE CAN'T FUCKING DO IT.
That reminds me, this film didn't really shy away from the concept of death, which was cool. I thought it was a little weird when it showed the family just casually killing all those henchmen in those weird floating ship thingees. Yeah, they blew up in fireballs and such, but there were people flying those ships! Still, both parents and their kids in the audience didn't seem to mind and were cheering them on. I just know ONE over protective, loud mouth soccer mom is going to ruin this for everyone.
Anyhoo, enough yappin'. I strongly suggest you watch this movie.
While I agree that it's seems like the non-family characters, such as Syndrome, Edna Mode (who was voiced by a guy. The producer I think), and Frozone (who kicked ass, as well as finally gave a suitable explanation--for the time being--for powers over ice), were slightly more impressive and/or likable than the family members. Still, Elastigirl by herself was awesome throughout at least half of the movie, (she has a really thick ass! Which is a good thing!) and I personally would like to see a future one with the children somewhat grown so that we could see what they could actually do with some training.
Yeah, I said before, I extremely liked Frozone, since it was nice to see that he was more than just the "token black guy". And judging by the positive, near-applause reaction with the use of powers at the end of the movie when trying to dodge the Omnidroid v. 10, he was extremely well liked overall. I guess it helps that Samuel L. Jackson is also in EVERYTHING, so people have had more than enough time to get use to the voice, even when it's not swearing.
I felt that this film felt more like a homage to a spy movie than anything else. If anything it probably homaged "Adventure movies" better than "Sky Captain and the World of Tommrow", because it was more subtle than incredibly blatent. A lot of James Bond type references, like the Bubble Transport cars of You Only Live Twice. The music was incredible totally referencing James Bond. And hell, when Dash was dashing through the jungle, it reminded me of Star Wars. As for the 3D...well Pixar outdid themselves again. They didn't make it real looking, they made it LOOK INCREDIBLE. Shit man, just looking at a folded up costume...it just looks INSANE on how cool it looked. The action....really top notch. I'm surprised how great it is. But seriously, with all things that happened, I discussed this with my friend....The Incredibles seemed like the GREATEST film candidate...to be an R-rated film. I mean there's so much stuff they can work with, I would love to see an R-Rated version of The Incredible be released!
Imagine: Sam Jackson...swearing! "Bust through that wall, mutha fucka!"
Edna with an even edgier, sharper wit. "Do you know where your husband is?.....perhaps...FUCKING A WHORE!"
Violet was implied to be almost goth like, why don't we have her actually be goth/emo and try to commit suicide by slitting her wrists? Instead...her forcefields get in the way...BECAUSE SHE'S COWARD..SHE CAN'T FUCKING DO IT.
That reminds me, this film didn't really shy away from the concept of death, which was cool. I thought it was a little weird when it showed the family just casually killing all those henchmen in those weird floating ship thingees. Yeah, they blew up in fireballs and such, but there were people flying those ships! Still, both parents and their kids in the audience didn't seem to mind and were cheering them on. I just know ONE over protective, loud mouth soccer mom is going to ruin this for everyone.
Anyhoo, enough yappin'. I strongly suggest you watch this movie.
Women decoded-2
"You're so nice!"
Translation: "You're so weak it annoys me. There's no way you'll ever get to see me naked. That honor goes to some random asshole that treats me like garbage, but I don't mind because he's exciting and a little dangerous and my puny little female brain and pathetically low self-esteem considers that a turn on. Sure, he slaps me around, puts me down and steals my money, but that's okay, because I know he loves me! Even if I did catch him with my sister and best friend in bed together. I can change him!!
But who knows...maybe a few years down the line, when my looks start to fade and my biological clock starts a tickin', I'll look you up because you're safe and boring and the perfect father figure who'll provide for--my-- our children. Hell, you're so much of a loser, I'm willing to bet that you'll actually raise my kids from a previous relationship, you chump! Plus I'll have a husband that I can easily dominate, but never love. Oh, and I'll finally get to let myself go! So that hot little piece of ass you chased all those years will be a big fat, bloated, stretch mark covered, credit card maxing, mean spirited, lard eating LAND WHALE and you'll be stuck with me forever because you actually took that whole "till death do us part" bullshit seriously.
This is of course I don't end up getting knocked up my asshole ex-con boyfriend or wind up some trailer trash living off of welfare as some STD ridden, cracked out whore stuck with half a dozen kids with different fathers."
It's all so obvious if you just read between the lines, people.
Translation: "You're so weak it annoys me. There's no way you'll ever get to see me naked. That honor goes to some random asshole that treats me like garbage, but I don't mind because he's exciting and a little dangerous and my puny little female brain and pathetically low self-esteem considers that a turn on. Sure, he slaps me around, puts me down and steals my money, but that's okay, because I know he loves me! Even if I did catch him with my sister and best friend in bed together. I can change him!!
But who knows...maybe a few years down the line, when my looks start to fade and my biological clock starts a tickin', I'll look you up because you're safe and boring and the perfect father figure who'll provide for--my-- our children. Hell, you're so much of a loser, I'm willing to bet that you'll actually raise my kids from a previous relationship, you chump! Plus I'll have a husband that I can easily dominate, but never love. Oh, and I'll finally get to let myself go! So that hot little piece of ass you chased all those years will be a big fat, bloated, stretch mark covered, credit card maxing, mean spirited, lard eating LAND WHALE and you'll be stuck with me forever because you actually took that whole "till death do us part" bullshit seriously.
This is of course I don't end up getting knocked up my asshole ex-con boyfriend or wind up some trailer trash living off of welfare as some STD ridden, cracked out whore stuck with half a dozen kids with different fathers."
It's all so obvious if you just read between the lines, people.
Women decoded.
Well since I'm still in PHASE 1, I have a lot of free time to tackle the seemingly impossible task of decoding women and their clandestine psudeo-language that has plagued mankind for centuries. Yeah, I know I have my work cut out for me. I was going to help out with that Human Genome thing, but thought that wasn't challenging enough.
"I just need to get some perspective/space/time alone."
TRANSLATION: "You really bug me and I have no interest in you, but I'm trying to think of a way to get rid of you without looking like a bitch. Oh, who am I kidding? I'll just avoid you and never return your calls and hope you get the hint. Besides, it wouldn't be fair to the new guy I've met if I wasted my time with a loser like you. At most I'll give the whole 'I hope we can still be friends' line, but we BOTH know that's a crock of shit. Well, I'm off to suck my new man's dick! Toodles! Oh yeah...sorry about giving you that weird rash on your penis. I'm sure it's nothing."
And there you have it! If a girl ever says this to you, pack your bags, count your losses and go to the nearest Free Clinic!
More to come!
"I just need to get some perspective/space/time alone."
TRANSLATION: "You really bug me and I have no interest in you, but I'm trying to think of a way to get rid of you without looking like a bitch. Oh, who am I kidding? I'll just avoid you and never return your calls and hope you get the hint. Besides, it wouldn't be fair to the new guy I've met if I wasted my time with a loser like you. At most I'll give the whole 'I hope we can still be friends' line, but we BOTH know that's a crock of shit. Well, I'm off to suck my new man's dick! Toodles! Oh yeah...sorry about giving you that weird rash on your penis. I'm sure it's nothing."
And there you have it! If a girl ever says this to you, pack your bags, count your losses and go to the nearest Free Clinic!
More to come!
Friday, November 19, 2004
The invitation
you can count me out.
I was working out at the gym last night and was yappin' with Stan, a pretty cool country boy who I talk to every now and then. Anyway, he invited me to hang out with him and his buddies this weekend on their camping trip where they'll also be target practicing with their new guns and drinking lots of beer.
I've lost count on how many levels of WRONG that entire situation is:
Deep woods+Alcohol+Firearms+Rednecks÷BLACK MAN= HELL NO.
Now I'm sure they're just a nice bunch of good ol' boys, but I'd rather not take the chance of being the "target", thank you very much.
My darling sis
I having dinner with my family and friends at some fancy restaurant and my sister suddenly starts bringing up past girlfriends of mine and saying that she's surprised with my recent choices. When I asked her why, she simply said that they've been rather.... plain. A far cry from the more "exotic" choices in the past. I was a little surprised by this statement, but she did have a point. I usually went with the "unusual" rather than your average "plain Jane" variety. I told her that maybe, just maybe my tastes in women has evolved beyond the mere physical. Maybe I've considered a woman's personality more than her looks.
My sis pondered this for about half a second and started laughing in my face along with most of the table.
I kinda chuckled myself.
She then told me that she didn't want some "plain looking" nieces or nephews from me and her future sister in law must be as "fabulous" as she is. She won't be seen shopping with anything less! Then she started going down a list of who would be the perfect match for me and who would produce the most beautiful cousins for her own kids to play with and so on.
Sheesh... I do so love it how my life is being planned out for me.
I eventually grabbed her niece's Santa puppet and exploited her unusual fear of the things. That shut her up! Don't know HOW that ever happened. Maybe it's when I used to torment her with a rather evil looking cookie monster puppet when she was a toddler. Yeah, waking up to a blood stained, googly eyed, blue furred thing staring at you with the dead, cold plastic gaze of unspeakable evil would traumatize most 4 year olds.
My sis pondered this for about half a second and started laughing in my face along with most of the table.
I kinda chuckled myself.
She then told me that she didn't want some "plain looking" nieces or nephews from me and her future sister in law must be as "fabulous" as she is. She won't be seen shopping with anything less! Then she started going down a list of who would be the perfect match for me and who would produce the most beautiful cousins for her own kids to play with and so on.
Sheesh... I do so love it how my life is being planned out for me.
I eventually grabbed her niece's Santa puppet and exploited her unusual fear of the things. That shut her up! Don't know HOW that ever happened. Maybe it's when I used to torment her with a rather evil looking cookie monster puppet when she was a toddler. Yeah, waking up to a blood stained, googly eyed, blue furred thing staring at you with the dead, cold plastic gaze of unspeakable evil would traumatize most 4 year olds.
Wednesday, November 17, 2004
Random thought...
You know what's really sad? A fat chick with small tits. That shit's just tragic. It's like God hates her specifically.
My friend.
So I was talking with a long time friend of mine on the phone and we were yappin' about the good ol' days and how much fun we had together and all the things we seemed to have in common. We also griped about our shitty luck with the opposite sex. Just really enjoying each others' company.
Finally she told me that she had always had a thing for me and those feelings have only been building over the years. She also asked me why we never got together. Well, this was a total surprise to me. I mean, this was some pretty raw emotion she was expressing to me. I never knew. I then said to her in the most sincere voice that I could muster and told her in these well chosen words: "YOU HAVE HERPES!!! ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?!! THERE IS NO WAY, AND I MEAN NO-FUCKING-WAY I WOULD EVEEEEER TOUCH A DIRTY, TRASHY SKANK LIKE YOU!!! THE MERE THOUGHT OF IT MAKES ME WANNA CUT MY DICK OFF WITH A RUSTY SPORK!!! I'D MUCH RATHER DO THAT THAN EVER TOUCH YOU!!! WHOOOORE!!! DIRTY, DIRTY WHOOOORE!!!! YOU'RE GOING TO HELL AND SO ARE YOUR FUTURE HERPE CHILDREN!!!!!"
And can you believe that she hung up on ME?? The nerve of some people.
Chicks like this make it really easy for me to give up women
Finally she told me that she had always had a thing for me and those feelings have only been building over the years. She also asked me why we never got together. Well, this was a total surprise to me. I mean, this was some pretty raw emotion she was expressing to me. I never knew. I then said to her in the most sincere voice that I could muster and told her in these well chosen words: "YOU HAVE HERPES!!! ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?!! THERE IS NO WAY, AND I MEAN NO-FUCKING-WAY I WOULD EVEEEEER TOUCH A DIRTY, TRASHY SKANK LIKE YOU!!! THE MERE THOUGHT OF IT MAKES ME WANNA CUT MY DICK OFF WITH A RUSTY SPORK!!! I'D MUCH RATHER DO THAT THAN EVER TOUCH YOU!!! WHOOOORE!!! DIRTY, DIRTY WHOOOORE!!!! YOU'RE GOING TO HELL AND SO ARE YOUR FUTURE HERPE CHILDREN!!!!!"
And can you believe that she hung up on ME?? The nerve of some people.
Chicks like this make it really easy for me to give up women
Women and clothes
Alright, I'm going to be the first to say it: I don't like tight, revealing clothes on girls. GASP!!! Oh my God!! It's true!!! A man just said that!! The imagery of men being portrayed by the media as slobbering, drooling, horny, stupid meat sticks is wrong!!! Dear god!! It's true!
I'm not a prude, not by any means and I'm not gay (grow the hell up, you tards). Yeah, it's nice to look at and it's nice material to have when you're Taking Care of Business™ (TCB), but unless you're hitting it it's ultimately a tease. If you're not boinking anything, it can be torture.
I like tight jeans, shorts, tank tops, all that, but too much is too much. Leaves nothing for the imagination. Part of the thrill for me is getting her home and unwrapping your present. It's like the difference between rushing down the stairs Christmas morning, and opening the huge box labeled for you, or peeling the wrapping off the firetruck shaped present.
I'm not a prude, not by any means and I'm not gay (grow the hell up, you tards). Yeah, it's nice to look at and it's nice material to have when you're Taking Care of Business™ (TCB), but unless you're hitting it it's ultimately a tease. If you're not boinking anything, it can be torture.
I like tight jeans, shorts, tank tops, all that, but too much is too much. Leaves nothing for the imagination. Part of the thrill for me is getting her home and unwrapping your present. It's like the difference between rushing down the stairs Christmas morning, and opening the huge box labeled for you, or peeling the wrapping off the firetruck shaped present.
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