A great new buying opportunity!!

All crackheads share something in common: they will do absolutely anything for money and you can use that to your advantage. The trick is catching them early before they become the strung out emaciated, babbling hobos wandering the street.
You have a small window of opportunity when they haven't yet sold everything they own for a piece of rock, if you do catch them during this magic hour, then you've hit the jackpot!

Forget ebay! There's a growing population of upper class crackheads that not everyone knows about. The best deals lie in the storage units of once prominent lawyers and dentists who sacrificed promising careers to support their habit. Looking for a bargin on a nice set of titanium golf clubs that are usually thousands of dollars? Yours for a hundred bucks. In the market for for a nice cherry wood table set that would normally be around 5000 dollars? Yours for only 200 hundred bucks! Looking for a priceless ring that has been a family heirloom for generations to give to some random broad you met at a truck stop? Take it for 500 smackers! You heard me! It's a crackhead clearance sale! Everything must go!

Oh if the crackhead decides to play "hardball", just wait a couple of days when he starts jonsin' for his next hit and he'll be begging you for any money you're willing to give for his once prized posessions.

This is an amazing discovery! The ultimate deal would be buying a crackhead's 3 story lake front home for a fraction of what it's worth.
Turn one person's tragic affliction into your bargin hunting advantage! Take advantage of this growing opportunity! New upper class crackheads are being produced everyday! It's not just for ghetto folk and white trash anymore! Don't let the pawn shops and drug dealers take this potential gold mine away from you! Sign up now!

People with souls and a general conscience need not apply. Will not be held responsible for any shootings, stabbings, beatings, muggings or general hooliganism.