Women say the darndest things.

Here's a few random quotes i've stumpled onto over the months that I thought were just adorable.... until i found out that they were uttered by grown women.



"It's not pollution that is damaging our natural environment... It's the imperfections in our air and our water that are doing it."
- Pamela Anderson, February 2000)

"Smoking kills you, and if you die, you've lost a very important part of your life."
- Brooke Shields on a federal antitobacco campaign in 1998

"That shameless tramp deserves to be kicked to death by a donkey.... And I'm just the one to do it!"
- Claudia Schiffer referring to Naomi Campbell in 1998

"If you could live forever, would you and why?"
"I would not live forever, because we shouldn't live forever, because if we are supposed to live forever, then we could live forever, but since we can't live forever, that is why I could not live forever"
- Miss Alabama in Miss America 1994

"Everyday I watch the TV and look at those poor starving kids around the world, I can't help but cry. I mean, I would love to be that thin, but not with all those flies and death and stuff...."
- Mariah Carey (1999)

"I have not committed any crime, I just didn't follow the law."
- J'Lo after being arrested with Diddy

"If there was a nuclear holocaust, which couple would you pick (man and woman) in the world so they can preserve and multiply the human species?"
"Pope John Paul II and Mother Theresa"
- Carolina Zuñiga, Miss Chile 2000 (Chile as in the South American country)

"What kind of music do you like?"
"CD music."
- Natalie Paris (model) in an interview with Time magazine

"Where would you like to travel and why?"
"To Rome, because it is the place where Our Lord Jesus Christ was born."
- Marilu Bonchini, candidate to Miss Argentina 1999

"I've never smoked weed because it causes cellulitis."
- Valeria Mazza (model)

"It's wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago!"
- J'Lo (2000)

"Which historical character would you like to meet?"
"I would definetly like to meet Lady Di... fortunately, she's already dead."
- Alexia Zambrano, candidate to Miss Colombia 2002

"Do you think all the pretty girls are dumb?"
"No, there are also ugly girls who are dumb...."
- Paris Hilton

And this is local contribution from myself from some bitch i knew back in high school:

"Is your penis gray? I heard black people's penises were gray..."

Note that this dumb bitch said black PEOPLE. Yeah, we're all sexually ambiguous man chicks with big ol' swinging gray dicks. What the fuck! Bitch was lucky i didn't slap her silly with my freakish grey man stick.